Saturday, March 6, 2021

[18+] Slow Damage | Review + plot dump

[Updated 6/15/22 with some new tidbits at the end] 

It's time. 9 years have passed since n+c's last game, but finally our time has come in this year of 2021. Chiral's new yaoi... is here. As soon as I started, I could not stop.... It took me 9 days to read and another couple days to write this post.. and now ... we are here....

Towa chilling with his paints
Slow Damage
creator: Nitro+CHiRAL
released in 2021

Towa is a pain fetishist who also likes to paint after getting inspired from his wild near death experiences with unhinged people. You could really say he puts the pain in paint. A boy covered in scars, who finds a deep interest in looking into the 'scars' and 'wounds' of others...

This isn't a BL (boy's love) game, it's a BL (boy's lust) game. Okay jk it's a bitch's lobotomy game and I'm the bitch.

Relatively spoiler free review under the cut followed by spoiler filled xtreme plot dump.


Synopsis

The year is 20xx. After an economic crash and this and that happening, the city of Shinkoumi is now completely yakuza-run by the Takasato group, and the mainland's government is powerless to intervene. It's become a hotpot of chaos, and now besides the old people who lived there to begin with, the population consists of more and more weirdos who are drawn to the free-spirited nature of this lawless hell hole.

Towa lives a simple and monotonous life here as a clinic receptionist, though on the side he enjoys his hobby as the elusive underground painter known as 'Euphoria'. He only paints when inspired, and the motif of his works is "the moment one's forbidden desires are fulfilled." After finding a suitable model, Towa gets some hands on experience after work hours ripping apart their stitched up wounds (metaphorically) first-hand.

Characters

Towa

Towa erotically being a useless whore in the comfort of his home


Our beloved protagonist! Only 26 years old, this lad is already on a one way road to an early death with his alcoholic chain smoker bad sleep habits self destructive thrill seeking slut lifestyle. His favorite food is booze beer and liquor, and getting wasted is on his regular schedule. Though he has no liver damage yet, he lives in Taku's clinic so at least he has easy access to a doctor. While usually an apathetic man of few words, he becomes talkative when it comes to getting what he wants from someone (which he is very good at). Towa's favorite hobbies besides drawing is sleeping around and getting hurt by strangers. For whatever reason he can see people's 'auras', which he uses as a lifehack to read and manipulate people.


Taku

Daddy's here to tell you to get the fuck out of bed


Taku is basically Towa's doctor dad. He's a mellow guy who's well liked in the neighborhood, and he doesn't discriminate against patients be they normal people or yakuza. Dad does all of Towa's laundry, regularly cleans his room, and is generally very overprotective and caring towards him, especially since he's apparently been looking after Towa since he was small. While disapproving of Towa's more questionable hobbies, he's since given up on stopping him.


Rei

Rei ara yada-ing everyone's day a little better


Towa's coworker at the clinic who also participates in actively babying and looking after him. If Taku is the dad, then Rei would be the mom. They like to cook and frequently brings home made food for Towa to eat. While working part time at the clinic by day, they're a waiter at the bar by night...and also works as a body artist in between. To relieve stress they occasionally hit up the local fighting grounds, Death Match, with their gal pals. A milf of many talents, Rei is overwhelmingly kind, adverse to trouble, and enjoys living a regular and peaceful life.

Note: The subject of Rei's gender identity gets kind of convoluted and is only brought up in their route, so I'll be using they/them pronouns for most of this post for convenience sake...


Madarame

Y/N wakes up in Madarame's basement where he says: Good morning, your mother just sold you to me


Towa's mysterious ex who has suddenly dropped back into town after years of being MIA. Everyone told Towa he was dead, so he decided to move on and forget him. But surprise! Madarame's not only not dead, but he's also here to create problems on purpose. What does he want anyways? Out of everyone Towa knows, this guy is one of the people he's never been able to get a good read on.

Fujieda

Fujieda on a lawyerly stroll


A lawyer.



General Review

STORY: A | This game was a real trip. The story feels scattered and indistinct when just looking at the separate routes, but it all comes together... overall it's very narrative focused. Less about playing just to bang guys and more about trying to understand Towa and the world he lives in. Reading through is like piecing together a big puzzle. You just can't see the whole picture until all the pieces have finally fallen together... Still overall it is kind of a pseudo slice of life where things just happen without having a concrete goal. To sum it up, reading this VN felt like enjoying a calm stroll in the spooky woods looking for ghosts before finding a vicious pack of loose badgers. To be honest, it does drag sometimes though. Maybe even a lot. This VN is LONG long, but in my opinion the payoff you get for getting through it all makes the struggle worth it. Probably.

CHARACTERS: A | The cast is quite developed and even the side characters feel well rounded. Not only is the setting well thought out, but the cast is too, making Shinkoumi feel very real and full of familiar faces. The main dudes each are very fleshed out, each with their fair share of complicated motives and such and such, though whether you actually like them or not is another story. Honestly, I personally was not that fond of some of the characters as romantic interests, but I still liked them as characters. Towa is my absolute favorite though.

ART: A+ | The artwork is absolutely excellent. Each CG is awesome, the charas all look great, the blood looks yummy,  the aesthetic...nice. What more can I say. It's good shit. Some CGs I'll be remembering for a long time just for how bewitching they depict Towa... he is just captivating. If I lived in Shinkoumi I'd become a slave to his charm too. Anyways even outside of the CG art, the aesthetic of the game is super nice, and the care placed into even the menus and gameplay segments and this and that... chef's kiss.

DOKIS: C | This is not a dokis game. Towa is damaged and his capacity to love is broken, so not much you can expect there. This of course doesn't necessarily apply to his partner potentials, but the game is from Towa's POV so we only see his apathetic side of things. The game is generally more about the aspects of relationships that aren't the mushy passionate parts. AKA the horny parts... jk I'm talking regularly supporting each other too. In the end though, it really differs per character and what they want from Towa.

MUSIC: B | It was satisfying. Some tracks play a lot more than others, but some are bops, though the best tracks play the least often. Also the track played during some dream sequences I keep feeling like the lyrics are either teehee teehee or doo doo doo either way I don't want to hear it anymore. There's some pretty unique tracks used specifically at impactful moments, so that was cool as well. Also there's a crap ton of ED songs, at least 2 for each character. Still, I wish there were more tracks.

CRY COUNT: I cried one time. 

ISSUES: There was one problem I had when playing... The game crashes all the time. There's like a 1/10 chance the game will crash whenever I opened the backlog, which I do often because I'm the type of reader who forgets what I just read so I gotta reread a line lol. Anyways it was annoying. [This was as of ver. 1.1. Maybe they will fix this in the future]

OVERALL SATISFACTION: A | It's a good game. I quite liked it. Like I said, the romance wasn't particularly titillating, but the parts I liked were compelling. While I had my qualms while reading, after sitting with my thoughts after finishing I can say looking back that it was well put together. Even if I wanted some individual routes to be better, you can't have everything in this world... I'll just accept what was given to me. The care and detail put into the game and everything about it is very impressive, and this game definitely holds a strong place in my memory now.

It's very very plot heavy, so the kinky stuff to plot ratio is like 1:100. If you play the game, get ready to read for hours on end... it's definitely crazy engaging though. Once you start, you won't be stopping until you know everything.

In the end the game did leave me wishing for a little more... it definitely could have been just a little bit more extreme and it'd be perfect. But alas... well it's still a great read. 

Note: If you have ANY interest in playing the actual game yourself, I HIGHLY RECOMMEND you do so, especially since JAST is publishing it in english eventually. There are many little details that really enhance the experience that can't be covered in a simple plot dump, so reading the game yourself is better. Practice patience and don't read my plot dump or google characters. 

For people who wanna read it in Japanese, I feel the level of ability needed to complete the game is probably about intermediate, but nothing too impossible. It's no Mebiusline that's for sure, but it can still get a little complicated. 

If you have 0 interest or have already played the game then feel free to read my plot dump xDDDdd


CONTENT WARNINGS:
This game covers a wide variety of topics that might make the average person feel a little uncomfortable.

For specifics, the story contains instances of physical and sexual assault, lots and lots of graphic images of cutting stabbing slicing pummeling scratching and bleeding, murder, drugs and drug addiction, implication of pedophilia, child abuse, human trafficking, questionable relationships, domestic abuse, eye related shenanigans, unsanitary sexual exploits, mentions of suicide, trauma, trauma induced nightmares, insane people and general insanity, homophobia, PTSD experiences, and last but not least, terrible parents.

Also in one route there's some short instances of flashing and that high pitched bweee noise, though I'm not sure if it's enough to bother anyone.




















★★★Spoiler filled plot dump beyond this point★★★

Another Note: A crap ton of things happen over the course of multiple months in this game, and this dump is mostly derived from my memory so some details may be out of order or mixed together. Just fyi.

Man this was long af... I probably should have cut some parts but it all felt important. Also fuckit I just like to hear myself talk! Or... think myself type... ... .. ??? ? Whatever.



Chapter 1: Fraise (Common Route)

Towa's pocket watch

The story opens up in November, where Towa is living his regular lifestyle of drinking, smoking, sleeping, and being a receptionist. Taku regularly comes upstairs to tell him to wake up, and he frequently gives Towa check-ups, always asking if his sleeping pills work well. Towa likes to take his pills with alcohol (please do not do this at home), much to dad's chagrin, but he cannot be stopped. Also he's taking pills because he has insomnia, and the few times he does fall asleep he's usually plagued with horrible nightmares, so having pills helps knock him out too cold to dream. Rei frequently stops by since they're not just Towa's coworker, but his good friend too~ Probably. Apparently they were acquaintances since middle school, and Rei buddied up with Towa sometime after high school when Towa was starting his art career. Taku and Rei are supportive of Towa's artistic pursuits, though they are unsure about his...means of getting inspiration. Either way they are generally helpful and baby him whenever possible. Towa's artist name, 'Euphoria', was picked by Rei as well. There's a golden pocket watch hanging off his easel with that word inscribed on it, so Rei assumed it probably meant something to him. Towa doesn't care though.

Random photo of Towa's hand to fill space

His work place is just downstairs, so it's easy enough to show up when it's time for his shift when he does finally crawl off his sofa. Regardless, he's frequently late anyways, and his rather bland and serious coworker Arimura is usually really prickly about it. While Arimura is also gay, alas he's not interested in Towa. Either way the clinic is a friendly and nice place where all the staff just kind of accepts the fact that Towa is a wreck who just lives there on the top floor. Probably helps that the other staff besides Arimura are Rei's gal pals.

Some facts to know about Towa: I don't remember where these are mentioned so I'll just dump them here. Towa has barely any memories of his childhood, though it doesn't bother him because missing memories clearly don't affect his life. Towa hates silence and always needs some kind of white noise for comfort, as otherwise he feels put on edge. Towa only has vague memories of his Mama, but only that she taught him tricks for socializing and that she had many guests...(probably some kind of prostitute) he can't remember her face and doesn't care. Apparently he used to work with the yakuza, but at some on point he switched to being a freeloader here at the clinic.

random pic ft. peaceful everyday life here in Towa's room

Life passes as usual and Towa meets an assortment of colorful characters who will be important to the plot. Towa is actually the son of the current head of the Takasato group, so the current top yakuza dudes beneath him treat him respectfully, as do most of the minions. The two top guys include the uncle-like Sakaki and the megane wearing ugly Toono. Sakaki was apparently good friends with Towa's mom, so he looks after Towa with care. Toono however just has bitch energy.

There's the silly underling Igarashi who watches too many yakuza movies, and then there's the chaotic trio of Mayu, Kotaro, and Eiji. Mayu's an anime otaku, Kotaro likes violence, and Eiji is a nerd who's obsessed with bombs. They're all part of the yakuza, though these dudes all lean towards team Sakaki rather than team Toono. 

Sakaki is the next candidate for head after Towa's dad kicks the bucket, so Toono has a sort of rivalry with him. Also news breaks out that week that Towa's old dad did in fact kick the bucket, so things have gotten even more tense between the factions. (Of course Towa could not give less of a shit about all that though)

Mayu, Kotaro, and Eiji. They show up a lot

Good ol' uncle Sakaki

Ugly megane bitch

Another fact to take note of is that everyone's 'aura', or what Towa likes to call their 'smoke', has a distinct color. Each character is color coded so that's fun. Seeing that smoke gives Towa a general idea of how the person in particular is feeling, or whether they're lying or not so that's super convenient. Also, Towa's vision is completely fucked where all the colors he perceives has a weird like rainbow filter over it. If you look at all the CGs most will have some color tints around the corners, so that's what that's about. I guess that's the price you pay for being able to see people's smoke. 

Anyways, around night time Towa hits up his fave chilling spot, the bar called Roost. Rei works there as their main job, and the bar owner is also quite familiar with Towa since he comes by so often. Apparently the bar also runs an art blog, since the owner is a fan of the arts. Rei always photographs and uploads Towa's pieces to upload onto the blog (with his permission of course), and many times the owner will then frame the physical works in the bar itself. The walls are decorated with all sorts of bizarre paintings and photographs, though it fits the mood of the place. Roost itself has a theme of being a place for "degenerates", but not like... degenerate degenerates. More like just your local cool and fun absolute weirdos. They'll accept anyone here, no matter how freaky you are (as long as you are not doing anything particularly heinous or illegal). 

At some point Towa checked out the bar's art blog and noticed a photograph that resembled a cut wrist (though it isn't), by an anonymous artist who goes by the name 'Fraise'... Hmmm it perks Towa's interest. Besides all that, Towa also hears about a recent series of bizarre events. About how drunks who pass out in the streets will wake up to find a bandaged wound on their body... whoever's doing this has been dubbed as the wild crazy drunk angel or something like that. How odd! Conveniently enough, Towa ends up passing out piss drunk in the streets later on after guzzling his fill at Roost, waking up to find a nice surprise...

He has been kidnapped... Towa finds himself in an unknown apartment filled with nothing but plants. He also finds that his arm has been bandaged, unwrapping it to find a large cut that he sure doesn't remember having before. Since no one seems to be home, Towa leaves the apartment and casually goes home. While life continues, the local florist starts coming by a lot delivering anonymous flowers. Who could be sending these? The florist, who introduces himself as Ikuina, says it's against customer confidentiality to say...Hmmm sus. Anyways the flowers keep coming and coming, and Rei mentions how the flower language for each bouquet have romantic meanings. Could it be the anonymous sender is in love with one of the clinic employees? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

Going to Roost again, it seems that the mysterious 'Fraise' has come in person...turning out to be none other than Ikuina. He tells Towa he's a huge fan of his works, and that looking at them makes him feel some type of way. Everything about him basically screams "I feel gay around you", which Towa of course picks up on. Now this guy seems like a good target for his next model.

Ikuina shooting his shot
Ikuina: here have this totally normal and not creepy symbol of my longing

At some point Ikuina comes to deliver flowers again, though Towa shuts him down. Since of course the anonymous bouquets turned out to be from Ikuina himself, and the target was Towa...he's gay. Ikuina's heart is broken and he retreats. Rei's all like what did you do to the florist, and of course Towa tells him that he was the anonymous flower sender and he shut him down. Rei: "Towa.. you are a heart breaker T_T I feel bad for the poor guy."

Towa later goes back to the apartment where he was kidnapped to and picks the lock to snoop around, finding a bunch of dead flowers and bloody bandages. He also finds obvious traces of what looks to be where Fraise put together his art pieces. Towa feels satisfied with his findings and goes home.

Eventually he gets ahold of Ikuina and seduces him with honeyed words, telling the poor florist that he knows exactly what he wants. They end up going back to Ikuina's apartment, where Towa looks deep into his eyes and begins to pull out his desire... The pull and push of a person's heart, smooth and careful like the dripping of an hourglass... During these sequences an hourglass from a red alternate version of his Euphoria pocket watch (that has an hourglass instead of a watch inside) is used to depict the level of the target's 'euphoria', as well as a stitched background depicting their 'madness', with the stitching being ripped apart as they lose their marbles. Towa likes to call this Euphoria sessions.

minutes directly before extremely bloody events occur

Anyways, if going too far, Ikuina loses control and they black out as a bloody mess on the bed where they probably bleed out. The end. Not doing that however, Towa carefully seduces Ikuina and makes the poor florist come to terms with his greatest desire... his longing for the sight of a person's insides. He's dying to open someone up and peer inside. In the most whore-ish way he can, Towa gives that alluring "come here... :)" and they begin the erotic night...of knifing each other. Ikuina cuts a deep cut along the scar in the middle of Towa's chest, while Towa cuts Ikuina in turn. They press their bleeding chests together and fall deep into the ecstasy of pain and madness... sexy.

After fun times are over, Towa uses his last strength to call either Taku or Rei on the phone to pick him up, sending them his coordinates. (This decides which route you do first) After making the phone call Towa feels safe to pass out, where he then later wakes up in the clinic. 

After a couple weeks of recovery, he begins painting. While painting, Taku and Rei usually leave him alone since Towa becomes completely absorbed and unresponsive to anything and anyone, hardly driniking or eating as well. But when Ikuina's portrait is finally done, he can return to drinking and being fed Rei's homemade lunches. Yay. Ikuina is also apparently discharged from the hospital he was sent to, and all seems relatively well.

Ikuina's portrait: Fraise



Taku Route

Chapter 2: Doctor

Life continues as normal after Towa fully recovers from his cutting festival. Christmas is just around the corner, and Rei is preparing for a Christmas party at Roost! Yaaayy!! Towa checks his emails to see if any new paint model recruits have come asking, and as usual there's quite a few. Most sound boring though so he just ignores them. There is this weird anonymous spammer though who keeps emailing weird stuff like 'I need salvation blabla please oh holy something bla bla religious sounding bla salvation bla', and since it's weird Towa ignores it. Towa is not known for replying to his emails.

Towa continues drinking unhealthy amounts of liquor at Roost when he spots a patron who doesn't look like he belongs at all. A suited man with glasses, prim and proper. Who is he? Being nosey and asking the bar owner, the owner tells him that the man is a Doctor named Asakura from the local hospital in town. Hmmm interesting... a doctor.

Towa: I want you doctor

Completely ignoring the man's sense of personal space, Towa swoops in for the kill. However poor Asakura is frightened stiff and quickly makes his escape... good going Towa. Rei gets mad at Towa for manhunting in the bar and scaring away customers, but Towa insists he was just trying to make casual conversation and drink together, honest! Rei: -__-;; 

That night Rei invites Towa to leave together, so they take a stroll through the city. However Rei spots what appears to be thugs chasing a little boy. That seems a little unsettling, so they rush off to see what's going on. Towa's way too lazy so he just stands there and spaces off...at least until said little boy runs into him. The boy hides behind Towa before the thugs in question appear and tell him to hand the kid over. Of course Towa's just like, "okay sure take him", but doesn't make any motion to do literally anything at all, so the thugs think he's bein sarcastic and beat the shit out of him. Towa doesn't resist at all and thinks to himself how getting beat to death isn't so bad every now and then. After they're done, he tries to get up so he can go home, but for some reason he can't move...weird. 

Towa wakes up in the hospital, where he's treated by a nurse. Upon hearing what hospital it is, he immediately recognizes it as the one that prim proper dude works at. He inquires to the nurse about Asakura, and learns that he does indeed work here. Since Towa's already here, he decides to begin his new career path of being nosey as all fuck. He schedules to have a follow up appointment with... one Doctor Asakura.

Rei is alarmed to hear about Towa's incident, and blames themself for having just left him to chase the kid... as a way to pay Towa back, they decide to accompany him to his checkup! Yay! So Towa and Rei head off to the hospital the next day~ Though of course after hearing that Towa's goal is to snoop on Dr. Asakura, Rei's just like: -_-;; oh you...

Anyways, Towa harasses the doctor and makes him extremely upset and uncomfortable. Besides cornering him at the hospital, he following him at the bar, and spies on him in public. With all that, Towa manages to collect quite a bit of interesting information about him. First, Asakura went to college with Taku. Second, Taku doesn't like Asakura because there were rumors about how he was a pedo or something. Apparently Asakura doesn't like Taku either, because Taku was a delinquent during his college years. Asakura is very good with children, and beloved by the local moms and child patients, so he's afraid of being accused of being a pedo like he was at the last hospital he worked at. He only moved to Shinkoumi to escape such allegations and start anew. However he seems to also be struggling with something inside... some kind of turmoil... 

Asakura's armor begins to crack and he ends up telling Towa at Roost's christmas party that he longs to see a real angel. He's definitely not pedo or anything though, he just likes angels. Towa also notices that the little boy who was being chased by thugs previously seems to also be close with Asakura. Is Asakura looking after the child? With his expert stalking, he also finds Asakura at a local church staring at a painting of naked cherubs. Apparently he comes every day and begs those naked angel babies for salvation. Towa overhears his words and is a little alarmed at the time, since it sounds similar to those weird ass religious sounding emails he's been getting lately. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm sus. 

For more context, the little boy is named Hayato and his mom basically abandoned him because she's in debt. Asakura is the type who gives too much of himself to others, so he's been going out of his way to look out for the poor kid. He's also going crazy though because with all the pedo allegations and being a sensitive and weak person, he's started to become deathly afraid of actually being a pedo... like.. what if I am a pedo and just don't know!? What if I do something!!??? But I don't want to!! OMG. Like okay. He's losing his marbles... which is just what Towa likes in a man.

As Asakura's mental state begins to degrade, he once again emails Towa saying that he can't hold it in anymore. He's gonna commit a crime at this rate. Yes, Asakura is the weird emailer. Towa then shows up at the hospital at ass o'clock and reveals that he is indeed Euphoria~ That's how he found where he was~~ Apparently Asakura is desperate to see an 'angel' again and be saved, so he was about to cut open wings into Hayato. Sounds not good. Towa then convinces him to put Hayato aside and do it to him instead~ Teehee. During their Euphoria session, as usual if going too far Towa probably dies from blood loss... but if not, then everything turns out A-ok. It's arts and crafts time.

Just needed to share his sexy back
Towa surpasses any naked cherub babies in my book. THIS is a REAL angel

After fanatically stitching home made wings into Towa's back, Asakura seems like he's really seen the door of God and ascends. Having finally gotten what he's been looking for, he collapses despondent in a chair. Weirdo. Anyways Towa calls daddy to come pick him up. Dad is of course extremely upset at this bizarre turn of events, and quickly cleans up whatever the fuck is going on on Towa's back while he's passed out.

With that all done with, doctor daddy would rather have Towa stay still to recover, but he has a painting to make. He shuts himself in his room for the rest of the week to get to some good old fashioned painting. Meanwhile it seems Asakura was admitted to a mental hospital. Good for him!

Asakura's portrait: Doctor

Chapter 3: Nostalgia

Life is once again normal, and Towa goes with Taku to the local temple to celebrate hatsumode. They run into many familiar faces there, including Sakaki and Toono. And an unfamiliar one too... the elusive Mr. Lawyerman who's with Toono. He's not important though.

Towa also starts having more bizarre nightmares lately. About being in a red sea or something and a strange woman staring at him... scary. Towa's nightmare sequences also always feature the red pocket hourglass that appears in the Euphoria segments. Wonder why.

Anyways, of course Towa requests for Dad to change his pills since clearly these ones aren't working good anymore. Dad seems awfully busy lately though... also Eiji's regular online news mag drops an article on some low grade dark rumors about our beloved Dr. Dad here. Rei is PISSED!! Eiji HOW DARE YOU!! Taku himself of course doesn't really give a shit, and Towa doesn't give much of a shit either. All Towa really wants is better sleeping pills.

As the days pass, Taku gets progressively more tired looking and busy... what's going on with him? Rei is worried AF about it and even Arimura asks Towa to try to figure out what's going on. Towa's new sleeping pills don't work at all as he still gets bizarro nightmares, so he tries to ask Taku to fix them, but all he gets is finding Taku being all stressed out on the phone with someone. What is going on here...  Even his aura is seeming less nice and brown lately... sometimes even looking a little.. murky!? Unbelievable. 

a goth and his dad

One day Taku takes Towa out for a calm stroll on the edge of Shinkoumi where they have a nice heart to heart. Sort of. Taku still doesn't really reveal anything about what's going on with him, but Towa let's him know that he's there for him. Sort of. He's mostly just nosey.

At some point, Towa has more weird nightmares about the weird figure, but also there's a strange figure of a man who he feels comfortable with... This man makes him feel safe... But the figure tries to leave, so he says don't go...

Towa and Taku both surprised to find themselves in this situation

Oops! He said that IRL. Also apparently Taku came to check up on him between his hectic stressed working hours, and Towa grabbed onto him... That's a little embarrassing. 

Besides that peculiar incident, life continues to be boring, though there's more drug addicts than usual lately causing trouble around town. Towa even spots the lawyer he saw with Toono coming by to lowkey pressure Taku about something or other. Sakaki later calls up Towa and tells him that Taku and Toono are in cahoots, and that he should snoop. Apparently Taku has debt with the Takasato group, and Toono is using that as well as something else to control him. Suspicious. Eiji gives Towa the tools to put a listening device on Taku's phone, as well as giving him an app to track Taku's location from the web tag embedded in him.

Note: One of the Takasato group's big sources of profit is debtors. Anyone in debt has a 'web tag' chip implanted in them and aren't allowed to leave Shinkoumi. This is enforced at the borders. Also they are basically used and sucked dry for money, and if they can't pay some even get their organs harvested.

Towa begins operation super spy and discovers that behind a door he always assumed was some kind of files closet, was actually a secret path to daddy's super secret underground lab. Through the phone tap he overhears Toono demanding Taku to hurry the fuck up on his secret development of DRUGS. Interesting. So Taku is developing the super crazy dangerous drugs that have been spreading around town for Toono, and the whole thing is stressing him out. Seems Toono has a deadline for him too... Why does Taku have so many secrets he's kept from Towa? 

Next day Towa continues to not really do anything, but Taku stops him from going to Roost. Apparently it's dangerous lately so Towa should stay at home! Like... who does he think he is, Towa's dad? Starting to get increasingly annoyed with Taku's overbearingness, Towa let's him know that he'll do whatever he wants. Taku has no right to stop him... and so Towa immediately gets kidnapped as soon as he goes outside.

Pulled into a black car by Toono and his men, Toono has his underling inject Towa with some kind of drug before handing him back to Taku as a prank. It's basically a big "look how much we are harassing the people you care about now make drugs faster" kind of statement. Taku is very distressed as he drags Towa back to check up on him. Towa is relatively fine, though he does suddenly feel extraordinarily horny... the drug... was probably an aphrodisiac. Interesting.

Towa: I want you doctor daddy

Threatening Taku that he'll go out and bag the first stranger he sees if Taku doesn't fuck him right now, Taku ends up giving in and giving Towa a handjob. The father son bond... destroyed. Not that Towa cares at all, but Taku feels pretty uncomfortable about it. A single handjob is not enough to satisfy the lusty Towa though, so this and that happens and Towa forces Taku to experience some new things in life, though mind you they do not go all the way. The father son boundary is still in tact, even if it's just Taku trying to use gorilla glue on a snapped piece of string. RIP to him I guess.

Next day, Sakaki tells Towa that he shouldn't stay close to Taku since the guy is clearly up to no good with Toono. Taku is keeping countless secrets from Towa, and he shouldn't be trusted! Towa then confronts Taku in his underground secret mystery lab, and brings up how he might leave or whatever since Taku's being a weirdo lately with all this shady crap. Taku gets upset and leaks out some lowkey yan vibes, mentioning how he's watched over Towa ever since he was a wee lad and how he'll never allow Towa to be taken away from him... Taku grabs him, and Towa's like "are you gonna rape me or something" and of course Taku's like NOO non onononooo OF COURSE NOT WTF. I would never. I'm just worried about you as your legal guardian figure. Towa then ditches him and leaves.

On his way to nowhere in particular, he finds Igarashi who apparently snuck into the clinic and stole some of Taku's super secret beta drugs, though now he doesn't know what to do with it. Toono's men then attack and the two make a break for it. Taku also randomly somehow knew where Towa was, and shows up to protect him from Toono's men who start shooting. Taku takes a bullet and falls in front of Towa... and Towa barely responds at all. Toono laughs at how cold and uncaring Towa is before proceeding to drag him and Taku's body into his car. Igarashi gets away with Sakaki who also conveniently showed up.

Towa later finds himself in Toono's super casino hotel and is placed in a room full of cabaret girls. The implication is that they're all Toono's lovers, and that he also uses them to entertain guests he has here. AKA people he has black underground dealings with. He wants Taku to complete those drugs ASAP so he can do business with people from the mainland and get the power to overthrow Sakaki. Apparently the Takasato group banned drug sales before, but Toono is confident he can overturn that with the power of money and stealing Sakaki's position. In order to prank Taku, Toono has Towa dressed up by the cabaret girls, making him crossdress as a beautiful woman.

M..Milf Towa...!? (don't mind the line where i spliced the image)

When Taku is shown Towa's new look, he's in shock... "Maya..," he whispers... Who the fuck is Maya? Apparently she's Towa's mom. Towa looks just like his mom, what a surprise. Toono makes fun of how Taku used to be in love with Maya and is using Towa as a replacement! Taku of course says this is untrue, but Toono continues to brag about how he's gonna fuck Towa or whatever. Taku gets seriously upset, before Toono has enough of this fun and finally leaves the room with Towa. He then abandons Towa in a different hotel room after setting the line that he is a heterosexual so it would be difficult for him to bed Towa... he has to think about it further but will get back to him eventually. Towa doesn't give a shit and immediately takes off his milf cosplay as soon as he's left alone, changing into some random clothing he finds in the closet. 

Immediately bored, Towa tries to get past the guard standing by his door, saying that hes desperate to get a smoke. When the guy is unwilling, Towa breaks out his whore charm and seduces the man into running off to fetch cigs for him, promising him a good time as payment when he returns. Even Towa is appalled how idiotically stupid the guard is. A variety of shenanigans occur including and not limited to befriending the only sharp eyed cabaret girl (named Lisa), getting beaten up by the guards multiple times, being asked to become Toono's lover so that he can brag to Sakaki and Taku about it but not actually sleep with Towa because he's too heterosexual, getting beaten up again, getting in trouble, and so on.

Taku goes through a lot of inner turmoil since it's his fault Towa was brought here, as Toono is using him as leverage to pressure Taku into finishing his super drugs. At some point we learn that Taku's mother was a drug addict after his father left them, they fell into poverty and he worked tirelessly to pay for the hospitalization of his mom. Toono lent him a helping hand and paid his way through med school, though his mom then got discharged and died in the streets while he wasn't looking. Oops! That's around when Taku turned delinquent. Either way he still owes a huge debt to Toono for putting him through med school, so that's where we are now. He can't decide between just not doing that, or by creating drugs like the ones that killed his mom to spread throughout Shinkoumi. 

While all this is going on, Eiji calls Towa's hotel room phone. Apparently he found him through the web tag embedded in him and hacked Toono's private lines. And yes, apparently Taku secretly implanted an illegal webtag in Towa back when he was removing the angel wings from chapter 2. That's very sweet of you daddy! NOT!!!! Anyways, Eiji has made a plan to help ruin Toono's plot and get Towa and dad out safely. Apparently Lisa is his underling, and she's also assisting him in doing something or other. He's gonna blow up the hotel as a distraction so that Towa and friends can escape. Apparently they're using the drugs Igarashi stole to get the mainland police involved as well. Apparently after this whole things busted though, Taku will probably go to jail... still, it's better than developing super evil drugs.

Going through multiple levels of mental breakdowns outside of Towa's field of vision, Taku later visits Towa's room where he's kept on watch and attempts to kill him in a double suicide. Towa peers into his heart and uses his skills to calm Taku down and look deeper into what it is he truely wants... He then tells him that he already knows what he wants. Taku's already made a decision. He just still super wishy washy about it.

Towa: Stop trying to kill me
Taku: Okay

INSANITY END

It's true... he does know what he wants. He should have just done this from the beginning. Why was he always so wishy washy? Taku knocks Towa out. In his hazed stupor, he vaguely hears Taku and Toono's voices... Taku promises to finish the super mega drug in 3 days, and that he'll then be taking Towa home. Eiji's plot to bust the drug trade thing is completely forgotten... After finishing the super ultra drug in 3 days, the two return to the clinic together. For whatever reason, Taku leads Towa into the underground super secret basement lab, where he notices it actually has everything you need to live down here. Hmmmm what could this mean.

Taku locks Towa down here and starts shooting him up with drugs daily, to the point that he becomes a crippling addict and can't even imagine leaving anymore. I should have done this to begin with, says doctor dad... now you'll be safe Towa. You'll never go out into that dangerous world again and I'll watch over you!!! That makes sense! Thanks dad! NOT! WHAT THE FUCK. Okay so daddy's a little overprotective. I get it. Get some help.

Towa now keeps hallucinating bugs and keeps trying to dig them out of daddy's back! Fun.

GOOD END

So clearly that doesn't happen. Taku's made up his mind and it's not to become yandere. It's to admit that he just doesn't wanna develop those damn drugs! He decides to stop, even if it means Toono killing him. He also decides to confess his love to Towa. Apparently, he's always just thought of Towa as like a son or nephew to him... but as time passed... and particularly after Towa sexually assaulted him... he started to realize his feelings were not quite as pure as they used to be. In fact, the dark emotions of pedogroomer began to be born... Just kidding. Sort of. Man. Anyways. They have a heart to heart and Taku tells Towa that he wants to be able to protect him because he cares about him that much. He also clarifies how he never loved Maya. He respected her, but the one he truly cared for was always Towa... like... I can't tell if that makes this better or worse. Anyways, Towa accepts his love confession. He brings up how the comforting figure in his dreams was always Taku... how Taku has been looking after and protecting him all this time. Since he's done a good enough job at that so far, Towa is willing to be Taku's boywife, though he demands that at least some day, Taku tell him about the secrets regarding his hazy past. Taku agrees. Someday. That could mean anything!!!

A guard comes in to tell Towa that Toono has summoned him, but instead of doing that he and Taku fuck after Towa promises not to be Toono's lover anymore (even though Toono didn't wanna fuck him anyways but Taku sure didn't know that). Of course Towa wants daddy to be rough and hurt him, but daddy wanna teach him a new kind of pleasure besides pain... vanilla sex. He gushily tells Towa I love you and stuff, and Towa feels embarrassed for the first time in his life.

Towa: daddy bite me
Dad: I may be yandere but I only do body worship so no

After Towa doesn't show up to his appointment, Toono finally drops by, where Taku insists he's gonna finish the super mega drug. The two part ways until Eiji's plot activates. This and that happen, and Toono tries to stop him using gun attack. Luckily Lisa overpowers him and Taku uses gun attack on HIM! Alas, he's a good person (??? really?) and doesn't pull the trigger. 

After everything settles, Taku decides to serve his time in jail... and before he departs, Towa visits his home where they chill. At Taku's house, Towa finds a baby photo of himself...  Very pedogroomer of him to keep this right here... just kidding. I kid. Sort of. Anyways, Taku says that it was taken at a restaurant where he went to with Towa's mother. Hmmm seems like a fancy ass restaurant if you ask me.

Towa's baby photo

Taku then goes to serve his sentence of 2 years in jail, but gets out a year early on probably good behavior or something. He then is greeted by his malewife who waited for him all this time. Good for him. Taku continues to not explain Towa's hazy past to him, but hopefully they get around to that at some point post credits.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention, Taku is 47, old enough to be Towa's real dad. Towa lives the rest of his life probably in peace with his doctor ex-con sugar daddy.

Towa has quit being goth

Taku's portrait: Nostalgia



Rei Route

Chapter 2: Brother

Instead of having daddy pick him up from the Ikuina cutting festival, Towa calls Rei. Events follow similarly, at least until disaster strikes. Recently there's been a weird increase in violent attacks on random people in the city. One day, Rei drags in a poor twink they found bleeding out on the pavement. Wonder who this could be. Towa happened to be getting a checkup from Taku at the time, so of course Rei's like... excuse me mister why are you naked.

Rei is so done with Towa sometimes

After the kid wakes up, Towa still refuses to put on a shirt, so the lad has his eyes glued on the seductive man in front of him the entire doctor check up. Someone remove Towa please. Anyways, the boy introduces himself as Mizuno, and mentions how he was beaten up by a group of people. Weird! 

Throughout the week, crazy violent attacks happen more and more often. Rei's friend Arata is also attacked. Then Rei's attacked! Apparently this group is called the 'Assault Party', and they kidnap people to then video tape beating the crap out of at their party venue, before dropping them off somewhere random. It's all uploaded on this darkweb shitty site called the chaoszone. Chuuni AF. The Christmas party comes around too, and it's so uncool because all this uncool stuff is happening at the same time... awful.

Mizuno being effected by Towa's pheromones

Anyways, the squad become more friendly with Mizuno who is just sooo innocent and shy like... why did he even move to Shinkoumi? This isn't a place for twinks like you! Apparently he's looking for his brother who went missing though. That's nice. Anyways the Christmas party comes around, though Mizuno isn't able to make it. There, Towa hangs with Rei and their buddies and they talk about all sorts of things like body mods and family. The subject of Towa's family comes up, and he mentions how he had a little sister but she died of illness... so sad.

Anyways, after the Christmas party, Rei gets kidnapped and assaulted by the Assault Party. Huh?? Rude. The Assault Party continues to kidnap and assault more people Towa knows and it just gets suspicious. After Towa activates super snooper mode, he quickly becomes suspicious of Mizuno. Mizuno makes the most obvious slips of the tongue, like knowing where Rei was when they got kidnapped, or knowing this and that such and such other details. Like okay...you ain't trying to hide anything. He also gets intel from Eiji about how the person behind all this is probably an individual named 'Kirihara'. Hmmmm....

Towa goes ahead and gets himself kidnapped, but finds that Rei is there too! Why!? Rei was supposed to be in bed at the clinic since they were just beat up recently. Apparently Mizuno texted Rei about how he's the mastermind behind all these violent pranks, so Rei just had to come and see for themself... silly. Rei is honest to a fault after all... they just couldn't believe someone sweet like Mizuno could have done such a thing :'( 

Anyways, Mizuno reveals that his real name is Kirihara, and that his brother used to beat him as a child. Since his brother disappeared years ago, he longs to feel that pain again, so he beats random people and then has his thugs beat him too. Like okay, a little weird but okay. He saw a kindred spirit in Towa, and insists that he's the one who can give him what his brother used to... First he starts bullying Rei, but Towa gets pissed and uses his seduction to draw Kirihara's attention to himself. Kirihara beats the shit out of his own underlings so that he can have a one on one with Towa...

Why isn't he wearing socks

Through a Euphoria session, Kirihara ends up letting it all out. How he used to be afraid of his brother beating him, but his brother always looked so happy when doing it. It was such a look of ecstasy that he couldn't help but feel happy himself... it was like a form of love... from his brother. After his bro went missing, he went through his PC and found countless videos of his bro committing horrible acts of violence against people... and looking so happy while doing it. Kirihara now conflates that pain of feeling like he's on the brink of death with happiness. Like... okay. However, no one has been able to give him that pain so far! Everyone is just normal, and doesnt hit to kill like his psychotic brother did... He misses his aniki so much... Aniki... Nii-san..!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like. Ummmm. Well anyways, Towa gives him exactly what he wants. 

boy with brother fetish gets beat

If Towa goes too far, Kirihara falls deep into his insanity and they really punch until they're both on the brink of death. His last words are "Nii-san... it hurts..." Like bitch I bet it does. Anyways, if Towa clearly doesn't do that, they just beat each other to the step before the brink of death and Kirihara passes out on the floor. Towa texts dad his coordinates and asks to get picked up.

With that all over and done with, Rei and Towa get hospitalized at Taku's clinic. Again. Rei later admits to Towa that they overheard a little of their conversation, and they felt that they could somewhat understand Kirihara's feelings. How he was turned into this by his brother...since he craved his brother's love. Is it weird for Rei to feel this way? Towa doesn't really care. Kirihara thought Towa was his kindred spirit, but Towa doesn't agree with that. The big difference between them was that Kirihara was using pain as a replacement for what he really wanted: his brother to come back. Meanwhile Towa wants pain for the sake of pain. This kid ain't even close to his level! Noob.

Kirihara's portrait: Brother


Chapter 3: Contradiction

Life continues as usual, though this time around Towa spends a lot more time just chilling with Rei. They even celebrate New Years together at Roost with Rei's other gal pals, Junko, Honami, and Arata! Happy New Year!!! Anyways, even with all these fun and games, seems some remnants of the Assault Party are still going around causing trouble. How uncool.

Chilling with Rei, Towa gets some nice first hand home-made cooking at their lovely apartment home... and they also chill at the bar where Rei gushes about their body modification work. Rei is really passionate about giving people tattoos, body piercings, scarification, whatever the fuck and whatnot. Anything you can think of, Rei can do. They're super popular too, and people always come out to seek their services. Next to Towa's paintings framed at Roost, some of Rei's works can be seen as well. Photographs of the bodies of their customers. Rei admits that they've always wanted to decorate Towa a little... haha, though Towa's body is already like a work of art with all those scars. Still they could get a little touching up~ 

Team Rei ready to fuck shit up

Rei enjoys spending time beating the shit out of people at the local fight arena, Death Match. It may be called that, but no one's allowed to die there. Punks just punch each other and see who wins. Fun! There's apparently no rules, but it's still rude if someone sneaks in hidden weapons or whatever. Which some Assault Party remnants do in order to harass Rei and friends. Rei beats the shit out of them, but they claim that they'll have their revenge. Towa usually doesn't like coming to these things, but Rei convinced him to go. Seeing Rei beating the living shit out of people however, makes Towa feel some type of way...wonder why.

Rei's preferred mode of transportation

The next day Rei and Towa have a date and try to leave Shinkoumi, but the cops stop them at the taxi station! Apparently...Rei is a 'debtor', and so cannot leave the city. Huh!??? Since when!??!?!? Pissed off, Rei then goes with Towa straight to the Takasato HQ. There, Sakaki happily greets Towa before having Rei taken to another room. Sakaki does some typical uncle like nosey comments, asking whether Towa wanna inheret anything from his papa since his dad died, but of course Towa's like no thanks. When Rei returns, they look extremely sullen. After leaving the building, they explain to Towa how apparently, Rei's estranged father wracked up an insane amount of debt while gambling. He wrote down Rei as co-signer without their permission, which is apparently allowed in Shinkoumi since they're father and child. Now Rei must pay the debt, other wise their father will be harvested for organs... It goes against Rei's conscious to let such a thing happen, even if they hate their shit dad! Towa's just like... okay but why not just let your dad's organs get harvested. Sadly, Rei's heart is too big to be so callous.

Life continues, but Rei gets more and more stressed and secretive. They're hiding things from Towa... but what? Getting more stressed, now when Rei fights at Death Match, they go a little too far... Apparently Rei enjoys the sound of breaking bones. Oopsie. Besides those shenanigans, Rei talks about how they're gonna have to start saving money from now on, so they spend their last night of freedom going to an expensive sweets buffet. And of course, Towa has to come too. There, Rei ingests a massive amount of calories, since when it comes to food, they can really pack down a whole fridge's worth. Rei gets a sugar high and starts talking about how they think their libido might be connected with their stomach...does Towa feel that way? Towa's libido is connected to pain so he doesn't find it that odd. Anyways, he asks Rei if they're sexually frustrated, to which Rei gets upset.

On the way out, they pass through the casino where Rei mentions how gambling is an evil that destroys people. Funnily enough, they also find Rei's father there. Gambling. Rei is overwhelmed with negative emotions and runs out of the building, leaving Towa alone. Towa goes home without Rei.

There's too much text here so have a picture of Rei punching

A lot of this and that happens with Taku learning about Rei's situation and worrying about them, and Towa being nosey as usual, and Rei being secretive blablablablabla. At one point Towa finds Rei covered in wounds and exuding a red aura... different from their usual mellow yellow. Thinking they must be sexually frustrated, Towa offers to suck them off, which Rei attempts to refuse, but well... one thing after another... Towa comments on how Rei still has 'that scar' there when looking at their dick. Apparently it was from something that happened when Rei and Towa first met... but what? 

Anyways, after picking up lots of free info from Eiji, Towa learns that it's highly likely Rei is participating in a secret underground REAL death match fighting club. Like...it's like death match except it's actual fights to the death. For money. And it's run by Sakaki. When Towa asks Sakaki about it, of course he's just like yeah I made your friend join! They a good fighter haha. Wanna watch? So Towa goes and watches Rei kill a man. The sight fills Towa with a feeling he hadn't felt towards Rei before... Lust.

Note: During this route, Towa doesn't have that many nightmares, and what he does is just vague ones like about his dad... one has a vague presence of who is prbly his mom but his brain's like fuck that let's wake up when he tries to focus on it.

At some point Rei tries to make a vague attempt to meet their father, so Towa comes as moral support. However, just seeing him makes Rei lose their composure, so they escape from the premises. Towa talks a bit with Rei's dad, and comes to the conclusion that the guy is total scum of the earth. He begs Towa to help get his old job with the Takasato group back, all like "ohh I used to work with your parents~~~" and Towa's like... okay, none of my business. So that meeting is a bust. Towa goes back home with Rei.

Eventually they finally have a heart to heart and we get to learn aaaall about what's going on here. Turns out, Rei is seriously confused. Apparently Rei used to stalk Towa ever since they went to different high schools, because they seriously looked up to his free spirited lifestyle (I'm not sure if that's what I'd call it but okay). When Towa began looking for models, Rei was one of the first to sign up, having wanted to turn a new leaf after graduating high school. Rei wanted Towa to capture the moment when they attained their desire of abandoning their male gender...by cutting off their own dick. That's where the scar came from...haha. Anyways, clearly that didn't work out since it hurt like a bitch, so that painting attempt was a bust. 

Towa looks like such a twink in this picture

It turns out, Rei has always had issues with their gender, since ever since they were young they were as cute as any pretty girl. Their mother always gushed over how cute they were, so they thought it was normal when they realized they liked boys. By this time, Rei's parents were divorced from their dad's gambling habits, and so they just had their awful shit dad. Dad was so disgusted by Rei's liking of men, that he was like "You're dead as a man!!!" and then disowned baby Rei, kicking them out of the house. Ever since, Rei was like... okay so I can't be a man, so I'll just live as a woman!!! But still... Rei's heart was in turmoil. Were they a woman? A man?!?!? What!!!!???? Rei thought they could live happily as a woman, but then came to realize how much they loved the sound of breaking bones. That is not feminine... it's manly!!! Did Rei actually enjoy being... manly?? Not womanly? Hmmmm... what does this all mean. Towa's here just like... I don't really give a shit. You can identify as whatever you want. So Rei decides to live as a MAN from now on... super otokomae. Super manly. Punch punch man. Start using ORE instead of ATASHI... Please refer to me as masculine from now on, Towa~~~ Who cares what my shit dad said I'll became a man now~~ And Towa's like okay. 

Anyways, the rest of the Euphoria session talks about Rei's feelings towards his parents. Like, Rei's dad is shitty and homophobic and also just general trash, and Rei's mom basically left him to live with said shit dad. Oh yeah I also forgot to mention it was also revealed that Rei's dad used to do human trafficking work for the Takasato group, and Sakaki threatened Rei saying he'd let dad continue that work if Rei didn't take up the debt and join the death fight club. Very shitty of him. Anyways for whatever reason, this conversation can push Rei to go down insane end somehow even though everything was going just fine so far.

INSANITY END

So Rei goes to finish his last death club fight match needed to pay off his dad's debt, and then cuts ties with him. However he decides that he feels most alive while killing people anyways, and that maybe he'll continue this career... Rei becomes the most powerful, top fighter in the death match club while Towa goes missing. Where to you ask? To Rei's room!!! He becomes Rei's little pet babyslut malewife. Rei keeps on winning that sugar daddy cash from the fight ring to shower his sugar baby with love at home, coming home each night to fuck Towa's brains out. Now he can be independent and manly~~ and even support Towa~~ What a wonderful dream come true. Now Towa doesn't need for anything! Rei also uses Towa as his perfect canvas...and decorates him with all sorts of body mods. So wonderful. His perfect little canvas...

He also sticks his dick in Towa's empty eye socket. Just wanted to let you know that is a thing that happens. Yes he just leaks out of his eye hole. Yes there's a CG. Man... Rei what the fuck. Anyways Towa likes pain, so unlike Taku, Rei gives Towa exactly what he wants. Towa feels like he's just a toy/doll/canvas and that his opinion doesn't even matter to Rei anymore, but contemplating on it, he doesn't feel like it's that bad of a life to live. Towa... well... sure okay, if it works for you then sure I guess. At least he's not locked in a drug sex basement hospital dungeon.

the other cgs showed his other eye so i had to use this one

GOOD END

So clearly that doesn't happen. Anyways, what Rei really wants is to have a one on one fight with Towa. Man to Man. Mano A Mano. They then beat the shit out of each other outside, before beating turns to making out. Rei officially asks Towa out, and he accepts,  saying that he hasnt disliked Rei's company so far so why not. They then return back home to fuck. Apparently Rei is a virgin... Towa takes pride in taking his v-card, and congratulates him on the sex. Also, it turns out Rei's dick is like... massive. Extremely huge. It's also implied in insanity end with all that... transpired, but yeah it's explicitly mentioned how huge it is. Good for you, Towa.

Rei commits murder

Rei goes to fight his last death club fight match and Towa heads off to see it with Sakaki and invites Taku to come with, though Taku inevitably doesn't show. Sakaki proposes that he play a round of poker with him, and if Towa wins, he'll clear all of Rei's dad's debt so that Rei can go home clean after today's match. After beating him with his unreadable poker face, Towa decides to go find Rei's shit dad to drag him to watch Rei's fight. During the fight, Taku and even Junko and friends show up! Everyone watches as Rei almost dies, but seeing his son in this state finally wakes shit dad up and he's like OMG REI... DON'T DIE... T_T; Towa also yells out for Rei, so using the power of love (the only person's voice he actually heard was Towa's), Rei suddenly powers up and murders his opponent. Yay! Everything's resolved, Rei decides to allow his dad to communicate with him (I can't understand why tho since imo he is worthless shit), and everyone is happy

A year passes, and now Rei has fully transformed into a more manly Rei. Apparently. He now travels and has fun with his boy toy, Towa.

This picture looks so odd to me for some reason. is this a water commercial

Rei's portrait: Contradiction

EXTRAS

So during Rei and Taku's route, there's some bonus 'early endings' of sorts you can get if Towa misses major plot events by spending that time fucking Mayu or Kotaro instead. They're funny so I'll explain those too.

For Mayu's, Mayu asks Towa over to his house, to which he agrees since he has time to kill, and they go to Mayu's humble abode... Of course, he had ulterior motives though. Apparently Towa greatly resembles Mayu's waifu, 'Yukimi-chan', in both looks and personality. Towa doesn't think he looks like an anime girl, but the eyes of an otaku are not like those of a regular human. Towa doesn't fit in the cosplay Mayu has, so they just use a wig so that Mayu can fulfill his dream of fucking his waifu. Awesome. Towa finds the experience odd but not entirely disagreeable.

Towa sees a real life otaku lair for the first time

For Kotaro, he propositions Towa, to which he accepts. Apparently sex with Kotaro is helpful for clearing Towa's head. Literally. Because they fuck in a bathroom stall where Kotaro proceeds to bash Towa's head into the wall, just how he likes it. After passing out, he wakes up to find himself alone in the stall so he has to finish getting himself off solo. Great. 

Towa needs to rethink his life

Well doing either of these prevents the boyfriend potentials' routes from continuing so the game ends.

Madarame Route

After completing either Taku or Rei's route, Madarame's route becomes unlockable. During chapter 1, you receive a new option to use during the Euphoria session with Ikuina. This causes something similar to the going too far result, except this time Towa survives. Ikuina does too, but he hangs himself after waking up in the hospital. 

Chapter 2: Immutable

Because of Ikuina's death, Rei and Taku act a little differently around Towa. Rei is pretty upset about it, and it just reminds Taku how what Towa is doing is not a good thing. Towa however could not give less of a shit about it. What he and Ikuina did together was a mutual agreement. If someone died from it, then it was something they'd already agreed was a possibility and so there shouldn't be any hard feelings over it. AKA it's not his problem if Ikuina wanted to die after fulfilling his deep desire. Rei and Taku do not take this nearly as well as Towa does, but it's not like there's anything they can do about it. 

For whatever reason, Towa still feels horribly unsatisfied... he wants another fix ASAP. But what? Where? For once in a long time, he actually decides to meet up with some of the half baked applicants applying to model for him, trying to get a good high to ease this unsettling feeling. The guy he meets up with has a desire to 'choke someone', so they go to a love hotel where the guy strangles him for a minute before thanking him and running away. So basic. That's basically nothing. Towa is annoyed AF for wasting his time on low grade partners like this.

Sakaki ends up calling Towa over later to ask him if he's okay after killing a man. Of course Towa doesn't give a shit, so Sakaki's like haha okay as long as you're good :))) or whatever. Towa is still in a meh mood...unhappy. He also spotted Toono on the way there, and Lawyerman at the office, but whatever they're up to is none of his business.

While getting completely wasted at Roost, he hears about cases of a ghost beating the shit out of people at the death match area. Deciding to drunkenly loiter around that side of town, some cloaked figure with a strong blue aura does indeed start beating on him, and Towa of course throws a punch back in retaliation, though there's not much he can do while piss drunk. Either way, he tries telling the guy "If you gonna beat me up you might as well put your back into it bitch." However, the figure ends up ditching Towa when team Kotaro and friends appear. They're just like "wow what are you doing here. It's dangerous so go home! But if you're trying to catch a man then feel free to lie there lol." Good ol' Kotaro and friends.

After they leave him, Towa is left thinking about how that dude seriously wasn't trying when punching him at all...as if making fun of him. That probably wasn't even half his full strength. Annoying AF. Somehow or other, he finds the strength to go home.

Towa then has a dream reliving the past... Lying on the ground by the harbor. Seeing a bright full moon. Looking down at his hand covered in blood. Ouch. However upon waking up, he's once again at the death match area... what the fuck he just went home earlier! What is going on with Towa? He starts thinking a lot about the past that he doesn't want to remember. His memories of that incident are foggy as well...

Passing rumor says the mysterious punch man ghost is the ghost of Madarame, who died in the gang war some years ago. Towa of course knows that Madarame is dead, so it can't be him. Or can it? Hmm? Is he really dead? He doesn't think about it that much until the owner at Roost hands him a red old lighter. Someone apparently came and asked for him to give it to Towa. It's Towa's old lighter that he lent to Madarame before he went off and got killed... !??!??!? What could this mean?

The symbol of their love ominous red lighter

Towa doesn't have the fondest memories of Madarame. Or more like he just doesn't want to remember him. Because apparently, Madarame killed Kaga, a yakuza member who used to have a position equal to that of Sakaki or Toono, and who was also Madarame's closest bro friend. Kaga was also Towa's half brother from another mother. Madarame betrayed him... killed him... and then died. That's what everyone says. But did anyone ever find his body? After doing some intense snooping, Towa comes to the conclusion that his body was never found. Sakaki also handwaves the whole thing and tells Towa to just forget about him. Hmmmm....

He becomes more and more obsessed with this research, trying to disprove the fact that Madarame's alive. But too bad, all hints point to him being alive. Later, Taku goes missing and can't be found anywhere. Towa gets a mysterious call, asking him to come to the alley behind the clinic at 2am if he wants daddy back, so of course he goes...where he finds dad passed out in the alley!? Before he can process it, he gets knocked out...and kidnapped!

Towa gets to experience what it feels like to be a dog

Towa wakes up to find himself chained with a dog collar on. There's also a rather predatory looking man staring directly at him. The legend himself. Madarame. Towa's not all that surprised to see that he's still alive, seeing that it was basically obvious...but still. This man puts him on edge. His blue smoke doesn't come out much and is generally steady so it's hard for Towa to get a good read on him.

Madarame mentions how he's always believed Towa would look great in a collar, and that he's finally come back to own him (like a pet).  Towa demands to be let go, and in response, Madarame beats him around and tells Towa he'd better 'remember', whatever that means...  Madarame tells Towa that he'll only take the collar off when Towa 'comes back', but like... what does that mean? Stop being cryptic old man. When Towa asks why Madarame hurt Taku to get to him, all Madarame says is how Taku sucks. How Towa's been living a lie because of him. All Taku does is lie to Towa and hide things. While that's not entirely untrue, Towa doesn't know that at this point and gets a little offended.

He then states how he returned to Shinkoumi to kill Sakaki and Toono for funsies. "And also...for you I guess," he adds on extremely unromantically. Towa does not understand. Apparently back when they fucked around together in the past, Madarame also had a tendency to always say "I'm gonna own you someday", so maybe... this is related. Just maybe. And yes they used to fuck a lot in the past. They were fuck buddies who were very sexually compatible.

Towa finds that Madarame really intends to keep him chained up here. The chain is long enough to reach the bathroom at least, but this is a dilapidated abandoned building in the death match area. Shitty.. Also Towa just naturally has a rebellious spirit and hates being told what to do, so he tries cutting the leather collar off with some random stuff he finds on the floor. Alas it mostly just cuts his neck rather than the leather. He'd probably die first... but it's not like Towa's one to have ever avoided an imminent death! Either way, Madarame catches him and smacks at him. Bad dog.

Time passes and Towa becomes more haggard as he refuses to eat. The silence in the room makes him feel super unsettled and he tries to mentally escape by jacking off, though clearly that's not a good long term solution. Even though he's always accepted he could die at any moment, the idea of living like this here just pisses him off... He'd rather bite his own tongue off. Though Madarame catches him trying that and smacks him again. 

In general he smacks Towa around every time he finds signs that Towa's doing stupid shit like that, and also force feeds him when Towa refuses to eat. Extremely sexy of him. He even washes Towa! It's really like raising a dog. At one point he fucks him, though Towa finds that he doesn't mind too much. Since like we've previously established, Towa unfortunately enjoys being mistreated (although he still hates being 'kept'). After getting used for pleasure, Towa wakes up to find Madarame asleep!? And his collar's not on!? So he tries to snoop around and grabs Madarame's knife... but surprise! He was just pretending to be asleep and this was a prank. He then smacks around Towa some more. 

Madarame sharing beer with Towa

On another occasion, Towa again finds his collar unlocked so he tries wandering out of his room, though he soon finds that the building is being attacked by assassins... Oops. When one tries to threaten Madarame's location out of him, of course the man himself swoops in to save the day. However at this moment, Towa has an epiphany. His memories of the past on that harbor night comes back. It wasn't Madarame who killed Kaga... it was Toono. Toono and Sakaki had collab'd together to kill Kaga, since they didn't agree with his policies. Toono tried to shoot Madarame after he refused to join him, but Towa jumped in the way, losing his eye in the process. It was a miracle that the bullet didn't reach his brain... By the time he woke up in the hospital, he'd gotten short term amnesia about the event. Hmmm. So Towa tells Madarame that he remembers about Toono before passing out. When he wakes up again, they are in a completely new shithole crap shack humble abode now. There sure are a lot of abandoned spots to live in near the messy death match area. Anyways nothing really changes after that.

Towa's memory of the past being super intense  fuck buddies with Madarame

As Towa starts losing his marbles living in captivity, Madarame even takes him on a walk outside, where he beats up some random people and gets bored quickly. The people here are too weak! Why is he going around beating people up and drawing attention when the entire yakuza is out to get him you ask? Because he likes to!! What about it!? He then starts a fight with Towa and they beat the shit out of each other. Or more like he beats the shit out of Towa, but there was at least an attempt on Towa's side. They then have crazy intense sex in public outdoors. At this point it dawns on Towa that Madarame gives him all the satisfaction he could ever need. That unsettling feeling he had at the beginning of the chapter? Well crazy sex with Madarame blows all those worries out of the water. Towa starts to feel like he's meant to be here rather than anywhere else. On a separate outing, they run into Rei who begs Towa to come home. Rei asks whether Madarame's forcing Towa or something, and that it's out of character for Towa to be so docile for a strange man??? But yeah Towa is doubtful about leaving behind his new pet dog lifestyle... he's having a hard time making decisions so he's decided to let Madarame make his decisions for him. He quietly leaves with him, leaving Rei behind...

However after going back to their humble shit shack, Madarame asks Towa to make a decision. This side, or that side? Towa doesn't like being asked questions so they start pummeling each other (aka Towa gets his shit kicked in), and Madarame tells Towa to GTFO. "I don't need someone who's lost like you." Towa gets super pissed off so he leaves and goes back home, much to Rei and Taku's delight. They baby over him since he looks like absolute shit, having become skinnier, dehydrated, bruised, and with a fucking collar mark bruise on his neck...he just looks awful. But Towa doesn't care about any of that.

Towa 5 seconds before getting his shit kicked in

Being home Towa just feels like shit (mentally, not physically). No matter what, he can't get thoughts of Madarame out of his mind. Chilling at Roost, he starts recalling their crazy awesome super duper good sex they had and he gets so horny that he ends up leaving to jack off in an alleyway. Towa... what's wrong with you. After a day of mulling over how many marbles he's dropped, almost getting kidnapped at gunpoint by Toono, and drawing like a crap ton of pictures of Madarame, he decides that enough is enough. Sure, living on 'this side' is comfortable, but he belongs with Madarame. He needs him. And he NEEDS HIS CRAZY GOOD FCKGING DICKING DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Towa abandons everything and beelines back to Madarame. Rei and Taku try to stop him and ask him WHY!? Why are you going back??? But of course, Towa has nothing to say to them. What could he even say? I have to go back because the dick too bomb? Better to not say anything at all. 

Upon returning to Madarame's shit hole lair, Madarame's just like "had a fun trip? :)" as if knowing Towa was gonna come back all along. Towa gets so pissed he starts swinging fists, but obviously that doesn't amount to much. He gets beat again and they have crazy awesome super duper good sex, just the way Towa likes it. Afterwards, Madarame says that Towa doesn't need the leash anymore, since like he said, he'd let him stop wearing it when he came back! ;) Haha get it. Towa is not amused but whatever. 

5 seconds before the crazy wild awesome sex

Also, it's important to note here that what Madarame really meant by 'coming back' was for Towa to return to his old self. Before he got his eye shot out, Towa used to be a lot more...fighty. Less willing to be a punching bag. Whenever Madarame smacks him around it makes Towa wanna smack him back, and that's just what Madarame likes in a pet boyfriend. That one time he anonymously started beating on Towa in the streets, the moment Towa swung back and looked at him in the eye with those spicy eyes... he knew Towa hadn't really changed deep down... that's why he kidnapped him. Romance is alive.

Life continues, and it turns out that Mayu, Kotaro, and Eiji were actually Madarame's minions all along, reporting to him about the going-ons in Shinkoumi ever since he went MIA. The squad plans their strategy to kill Sakaki and Toono once and for all, and of course now Towa's in on it too. They move to a superior secret lair, where Madarame and Towa chill and maybe even flirt a little. A cat comes by and Towa remembers how Madarame always loved kitties... Though all he has to say in response is how Towa is kind of like a kitty too. Just like a kitty, he can live on his own but he'll get skinnier and messier... he needs an owner. :) Towa rolls his eye. 

Flashback to Madarame with kitty ft. blonde Towa. Yes he used to be blonde and yes it looked bad.

So part 1 of Madarame's absolutely ridiculous assassination plan is to infiltrate Toono's super hotel party (the one he was gonna sell drugs at in Taku's route), and have Towa disguise as security. He'll then approach Toono, catch him off guard and whisper to him, "Madarame's tired of waiting for you chicken shit." This is just to spook him since the actual assassination will be later. Of course Towa's just like...why? Why go through that trouble? What's the point???? Madarame's answer? Because it would be funny and awesome. It'd make Toono freak out. And life's all about being funny and awesome. Towa would roll his eye more but at this point he should just come to terms with the reality of who he's dating.

Anyways in prep for the plan, those infiltrating (Mayu Kotaro and Towa) get decked out to go.

Who is this.. you're not Towa 

The squad all compliment Towa on his good looks, and applaud his ability to tie a tie. Madarame comments on how it's a given that Towa can tie a tie, since he grew up like a bocchama after all. Either way they begin Operation Prank Toono. On the way to Toono's hotel, Towa stops by Takasato HQ to say hi to Sakaki. He confirms that Sakaki was involved in killing Kaga, and Sakaki tells Towa that Madarame's path will lead to nothing but ruin. All Towa has to say back to him is a warning to worry a bit more about his own head. 

At Toono's hotel, the squad easily sneak in just by dressing like security... too easy. Towa's surprised however to find that Toono is sitting with Taku!? He remembers everything Madarame said about how Taku is hiding things from him. During his dog walks with his man he also saw all the drugees and stuff, so he easily puts together what's going on here. He knows that Taku is probably being threatened...but it's none of his business now. He pranks Toono, and Toono is shook upon recognizing Towa. Before Taku could stop him, Towa skedaddles and returns to his hunky man's embrace outside the premises. They really did all that just to prank Toono.

After the operation, Madarame and Towa enjoy peace at their hideout. They're both quiet individuals when it comes down to it, so words aren't necessarily needed between them. In the past when they were sex friends, it was the same. Just quietly enjoying each other's company.

They then hold a party to celebrate operation: destroy Takasato, which they would be commencing the next day. The squad have their fill and are positive that Sakaki and Toono will die tomorrow! Whooo!!!! 

Party at Madarame's place wooo

Afterwards, Madarame and Towa enjoy some nice flirting hours... maybe even a little sentimental hours. Madarame loves how he and Towa are one and the same. They live for the moment... for the pleasure... for the excitement. Towa's a fighter who never just gives in or lets up unless he gets what he wants, similar to Madarame. Only the present between them right now exists. The past and the future don't matter, and right now... Towa is right in front of him. He tells Towa that he's never letting him go again, and Towa takes it as a confession. They flirt like crazy basically and make out while spitting beer into each other's mouth.

Towa then asks to do a Euphoria session with Madarame, because he wanna paint his picture! Madarame's like okay sure I guess. And so, they talk... about what it is Madarame desires...

INSANITY END

Towa keeps trying to dig deeper and deeper to find Madarame's hidden desire, but becomes frustrated since he can't figure him out... Madarame becomes disappointed in him, since it seems Towa didn't really understand him after all. The night comes to a cold close... what will become of their relationship now? Everything seems the same the next day, and their project goes off without any hitch. Madarame then stays to create a new group to replace the Takasato group, called the Madarame group, and takes over Shinkoumi. As the new boss, he then rolls out intense and ridiculous laws, such as demanding that all residences be logged and web tagged and tracked by the group. Anyone who doesn't want to comply can GTFO!! Shinkoumi becomes a scarier place under his iron fist... and Towa is there as his slutty lover.

While Madarame has stayed relatively the same, Towa has since become twisted by his influence, now obeying his orders and even killing people on command. But sometimes, he'll go into heat after smelling the sent of death and tasting blood and needs to get emergency treated by his man. They then have absolutely wild and crazy kinky knife bloodplay cutting dangerous slicing sex right over where the corpse of Towa's victim is just lying next to them on the ground. But maybe that just makes it hotter. While Towa drowns in pleasure, a part of him hates this slutty dog that Madarame's turned him into, so he tries to stab at Madarame while getting railed. This only gets Madarame even more turned on though... counter productive. Or is it? Anyways, after fucking his brains out, Madarame looks at Towa lovingly. He loves the Towa who still has that fire in his eyes... and thinks to himself how if anyone is allowed to kill Big Boss Madarame, it would be Towa and Towa alone...  Also it's noted that Towa's personal yakuza doctor recommended they stop this kind of crazy play, but both Towa and Madarame refuse to stop. That's life for ya.

Eroi... There's a variation where he slurps up the fresh Towa blood that's gushing out too so this is why Madarame is King



GOOD END

Anyways, that clearly doesn't happen. Towa peers into Madarame's heart and easily comes to the conclusion that of course the man doesn't have any hidden desire. He wears his whole being right on his shoulder, nothing to hide! He is who he is, and he will never change. He's been the same forever, and will probably continue to be the same forever...  They end the night in bed, and Madarame decides to show Towa something new. Something called... vanilla sex. He gently caresses him all night, and rails him until his mind blanks out. Towa admits that he's scared of drowning in pleasure, since he feels like he's losing control of himself, unlike how it is when he's drowning in pain. Madarame finds that funny, and decides that he'll continue to overload Towa with more pleasure from here on out. Great.

The next day, both Toono and Sakaki fall for Madarame's traps. He has a shoot off with Toono, and Mayu assassinates Sakaki with a bomb as Sakaki was trying to skip town. Yay, happy! With the Takasato group now collapsed, there's nothing left for Madarame here in Shinkoumi.

He and Towa then decide to go abroad together to go on an adventure. Towa completely cuts off ties with Rei and Taku and everyone else, and they never hear from him again.

Like a year later, Towa is blonde again (much to my deep chagrin) and he and Madarame are fucking around at underground fight clubs in America or something. Living a free spirited, random, and pleasure seeking life... Good for them. Except Towa because I want him to stop being blonde.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention but at some point it's noted that Madarame is in his 40s, so he's also maybe almost old enough to be Towa's dad! Awesome.

Towa why are you blonde.. Not even gonna comment on mullet madarame

Towa apparently painted this with random crap like rocks and grass he found around because he didn't want to go back to the clinic to grab his brushes


Fujieda Route

After completing all 3 other routes, you unlock the prologue chapter, chapter 0. Playing through it is the only way to access Fujieda's route. You might have guessed it from all this work to get one lawyer, but yes. He is THE route. THE LAWYER. He's the one. Man. As you can probably guess, this route has the most spoilable content in it. Reading past here is really the point of no return.

Chapter 0: Desire

It's the month before chapter 1, October, with Halloween just around the corner. For anyone who played the demo or read the manga oneshot... yes this is it. Rumors of a 'vampire' start going around, about a strange unshaven man who finds prostitutes and pokes a hole in their neck, before putting their pay in their pocket and making his escape. Like he's not even drinking the blood apparently? What are you doing man. 

Towa is minding his own business when he witnesses said vampire in the middle of his 'work'. Easily spooked, the poor individual quickly scatters as soon as Towa's presence becomes known. Hmmm... Anyways this and that happens, and Towa ends up chasing and cornering the guy in an alley after catching him at Roost. "If you want blood so bad, drink mine. In exchange let me draw your picture. :)" Towa activates slut mode and begins his Euphoria session with the vampire...

shllurrrrppp

If staying careful, Towa will allow the man to drink his blood, but push him away before it gets too dangerous. The man runs off again, but seems seemingly satisfied... and so Towa paints his portrait. Life goes on as normal, and the game jumps to chapter 1.

However, if Towa isn't careful and goes more towards the 'insanity' result... he lets the vampire drink as much as he wants, passing out in the alley while feeling his blood get drained. The vampire is left shookened, and he wanders off, seeming shaken and unsatisfied. It's implied that the vampire offs himself some time afterwards, probably as a result of what happened. Oops! This leads to what we've all been waiting for.... LAWYER TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The vampire's portrait: Thirsty



The Last Chapter: Equal

Towa is left extremely unsatisfied after his encounter with the vampire. He's just kinda on edge for some reason, but nobody knows why. In general everything's the same as the regular common route except this, and one other huge difference.

Arimura tells Towa that a package has come for him, and when seeing what it is, it's an extremely ominous red box. Inside, Towa finds a bunch of weird crap?? And a stuffed bunny... Looking at the bunny immediately causes him to vomit. Why? It also hurts his head, and his instinct tells him that he should stop and not try to think about it... but curiosity overcomes all else. Besides the bunny are 3 photographs of 3 strangers, named Ikuina, Asakura, and Kirihara. Never heard those names before... what could this mean? There's also some kind of black portrait, and what appears to be a diary entry, describing some kind of odd stuff about something or other these people did. Very mysterious.

Are we living in one big conspiracy...

Towa gets seriously antsy and becomes obsessively attached to this bunny. His bunny. He knows immediately that this is his late little sister's bunny. But who sent this to him? And why?

Life continues almost as regular as normal, except Towa is feeling a lot more... unhinged. Ever since getting that box, he NEEDS to know what it means. He tries asking about the black painting photo, and some people are like 'did you draw that?' like does it LOOK like something he'd draw?? Anyways, no results. Where are the answers...

So this time as usual, he hears about the drunk crazy whatever angel, and as usual, Towa gets kidnapped after collapsing piss drunk in the streets. But this time there's one big difference. While unconscious, he has a horrible nightmare about being stabbed and cut at by strange figures, filling him with a horrible fear. When he wakes up in Ikuina's apartment and finds that cut on his arm, all he can think about is how it's not NEARLY enough. Not even close to that horrible pain he had in his dream. But unlike the fear he felt in his dream, in reality the pain is just pleasure...right? So he grabs some random tools nearby and pries the wound wider and wider, before stabbing himself multiple times with a pair of scissors. It gives him indescribable pleasure(pain) and he makes a rather...nasty mess on the bed. After his work is done, he casually leaves and goes home.

Towa getting off in a stranger's bed

Because of this...alternative turn of events, Ikuina acts a lot odder when he first meets Towa when delivering his stalker flowers at the clinic. That night he heads towards Roost to get wasted when Ikuina stops him... he confesses to being Fraise, and to being the person who kidnapped Towa. After seeing the mess Towa made, he immediately knew that Towa and him were birds of a feather... they return to his place to get some action going on if you get what I mean.

Mid hack n' slash, Towa realizes that this strange florist resembles the photo of a kid in his box, so he asks for his name. Ikuina... Ikuina... hmmm why did Ikuina's picture get mailed to him? He doesn't really say anything more, and instead falls deep into this moment of Euphoria. After calling Taku and passing out, he has another wretched nightmare. A dream about a child standing in front of him and slicing him open, while a piercing pain runs down his back. It's a horrible and painful dream...

Months pass but Towa finds himself incapable of finishing Ikuina's painting. His mind keeps running and he feels restless, and he also is plagued by those bizarro dreams. While making a mess of his paint stuff in his room, another anonymous package arrives, containing nothing but Asakura's business card. Towa immediately darts over there to interrogate the poor doctor. He schedules a checkup with Asakura, and once they're alone together, he starts to ask him all sorts of invasive questions. Upon revealing the strange diary entry, Asakura's face goes pale. After being threatened a few times, he finally says his story...

Once upon a time when he was in college, a respected professor invited him to go out drinking. Being an idiot, he immediately saw this as an opportunity to get chummy and make connections, so he went out and got wasted. After he was completely drunk, his professor ended up leading him to a strange building that appeared to be some kind of brothel. He didn't question it at the time, having been inebriated, but looking back there were SO many red flags. Upon entering, they went to a far back room... where they finally entered a chamber with a small crowd of people. At their center was a young blindfolded boy... Asakura's professor handed him a sharp tool and asked him to CUT! CUT THE LITTLE BOY!! Thinking this was some kind of twisted dream, he ended up carving along the boy's back... In his half conscious drunken memory, it almost looked like wings sprouting from an angel's back... Ever since he was overwhelmed with a horrible guilty conscious, because no matter how much he wanted to banish this experience as just a nightmare, he's forced to live with the fact that that was reality. (Clearly Asakura's new found obsession with children and angels may have stemmed from this shocking experience. Interesting.)

Hearing all this, Towa feels horribly sick. That boy... was probably him. He runs off and just keeps on running. He spends some time getting railed to cool off, and tries to find Asakura again but apparently the guy got entered into a mental hospital. Days go by, and he finally finishes Ikuina's painting. But at this point...what is it really? It doesn't look anything remotely like Ikuina's Euphoria.

Weird painting

Rei comes in and finds the painting rather spooky... Taku also comes in and they end up noticing the bunny. Taku's aura suddenly changes for a second as he asks... where did you get this? Towa's paranoia activates and he reads that Taku knows something. What do you know, Taku!??!?? But of course dad feigns ignorance! 

Later on, Arimura comes to ask Towa if he recieved any mail. Apparently he got another package, but before Arimura could deliver it, Taku intercepted it and said he'd hand it over himself. However Taku didn't seem to be acting like himself... Towa rushes downstairs to find dad BURNING his new shady letter in the sink. DAD!! THAT'S MY MAIL!! FUCK YOU!! He smacks daddy hard and takes back his scorched mail. Just like before, it's a shady diary entry listing things that were done to an unknown little boy (probably Towa). Who's sending these? After running away from home, he ends up seeking out Eiji and asks him try to figure out where Ikuina is, and to look up this 'Kirihara' fellow as well. 

Towa has more horrible nightmares about being stabbed over and over again by someone who's laughing as they do it. Sick... he throws up more and is unhinged as usual. Taku comes in again and he becomes extremely protective of his bunny, grabbing a beer bottle to fend him off. Taku tries to calm him down, all like "its ok its ok, I won't do anything... daijobu... okay?" As soon as the words daijobu go through his head, Towa FLIPS. He completely loses it and dashes past Taku outside. His vision gets extra rainbow and its raining outside and he ends up diving into a little tunnel thing in the nearby playground. The words daijobu keep repeating in his head over and over and over and over again... Kowai... sickening.. scary.. 

[TN note this is a no brainer but daijobu means its okay basically, you'll be seeing it a lot]

As his brain starts to settle, he finds a bespectacled individual looking at him with some concern from outside the little tunnel thing. He throws a complete fit and tries to attack him, but the lawyerman drop kicks him and Towa is incapacitated. With his last grip of consciousness, he can hear what sounds like Taku running over and apologizing to the megane man...

Time passes and Towa still feels like complete shit. He's plagued with more and more nightmares of being in that red place and being surrounded by those awful voices or whatever the heck, and he keeps wandering out in pursuit of finding people to beat him up. He gets piss drunk again and tries to find someone to obliterate him when the lawyerman comes across him again. Seeing him again, Towa notes how the guy's smoke is a pristine white... very unique as it doesn't have a trace of any color, making it hard to read. He'd never seen a person quite like this before... Annoyed at seeing Towa's slovenly state, he drags him back to the clinic (having recieved Taku's contact info last time), and tells Towa that he'd feel bad if Towa's name came up in the news tomorrow. That's the only reason why he's helping him!

Lawyerman is too nice to leave Towa to die on the streets

He goes through the trouble of dragging Towa to his room, and is surprised to find all his weirdo paintings. Hmm... he also is strangely shook at seeing that bunny. He inquires about it, and Towa tells him it's his little sisters...since it is... but the glasses man doesn't seem convinced. Taku comes in and talks to lawyerman a bit, where we learn how his name is Fujieda Ryo and that he is a lawyer for the Takasato group. After he leaves, Towa decided to ask Taku about the mail he got, though Taku refuses to tell Towa anything. He insists that the past is better left forgotten. Some things are better off not knowing. Towa is not convinced. He then notices that HIS BUNNY IS MISSING!!!! TAKU!?? But Taku's like huh?? What... his smoke is clean. He didn't do it. .. . .. .. THE LAWYER...... ... Why... Why'd he take the bunny.

That bunny is important to him... in his dreams even, his nightmares, he remembers that bunny being placed in front of him..........

Next day, Towa uses his customer service voice to contact Fujieda's law office in an attempt to get ahold of the man, but to no avail. He's not in today. Wandering around a bit, he ends up getting picked up by Sakaki who talks to him to check up on him before dropping him off wherever. Finally returning to Roost after getting 0 leads on Fujieda, he learns that Fujieda was HERE. Earlier. While Towa was at his law office, the lawyer in question was snooping around Roost asking everyone and anyone about Towa... Damn. According to Rei and the owner, he said he was a fan of Euphoria's works, and was apparently trying to learn everything about him. Sounds a little shady.

They finally meet up when Fujieda calls him back with just a "are you in your room because I'm standing right outside." A little weird, but okay. He still plays dumb about stealing the rabbit, but Towa can let that slide for now. Fujieda continues to be a little nosey about Towa, and asks to borrow his Euphoria pocket watch. He leaves before saying that there used to be a store called Euphoria in this city...same name as Towa's artist name. Strange.

Since Rei is being nosey out of worry for Towa's well-being, Towa tries to interrogate them and ends up getting an interesting fact. Apparently Rei heard from Taku that that Euphoria pocket watch was something that belonged to Towa's mother. Apparently she probably had a connection to the store called Euphoria... Christmas passes and Towa still can't find any more clues. (He also gets the red lighter from Madarame again but it's not that important) He continues having nightmares about an ominous figure, but who is it... Where are the answers. He ends up seeking out Sakaki to ask him for info about his mother. Sakaki is in a church of all places, and tells Towa that today is his mother, Maya's birthday. It's wonderful that Towa wants to know more about his mama on a day like this. He gushes about how awesome it is that Towa used euphoria as his artist name, since it was also the name of mama's store. Like mommy like son!! Towa feels sick and ditches Sakaki.

He meets up with Eiji to get more info, but it turns out Ikuina killed himself after moving out of Shinkoumi. Great! Kirihara is dead too, apparently by suicide a few years ago...great. He had a little brother though, so Eiji's gonna try to dig into that. Pissed off, he wanders off looking for someone to abuse him, and while some rando who claims to have had an eye on him for some time does try to pick him up, Towa unfortunately scares the poor chap off with his extreme horniness.

I honestly don't know what the guy expected from local pain fetishist Towa

Towa cuts himself a couple times before wandering off to continue his fucked up life, returning to the tunnel in the park to sit in. Funnily enough, Fujieda finds him again, though for whatever reason the guy now looks like he got beat up. None of Towa's business though. Towa wants to collab with Fujieda to get information about Euphoria since they're both investigating it anyways, though Fujiedas like -_- idk if I can trust you.. Hmph. Well Towa doesn't like him either! He decides to go do some more digging to find something to win Fujieda's trust...

He goes back to Sakaki's to get more info on Mama, and Sakaki gushes for years on end about how beautiful wonderful talented kind soft wonderful smart awesome sexy cool smart his mom was, before giving him a photograph. Towa doesn't recognize the woman... Apparently Maya died from falling down the stairs in an accident, and Towa fell with her. While she ended up dying, Towa got amnesia from bonking his head... Hmm. Thinking about all this hurt Towa's head. He goes home and emails Fujieda the photo, and Fujieda mentions how Towa and Maya do look alike. Without giving Towa any info, he just takes Towa's before hanging up... bitch.

they all look like the same girl

Left to himself at home Towa gets pissed off thinking about how he resembles Maya. Where? How? He doesn't look anything like this woman. But looking into his bathroom mirror he can see traces of her... Shitty AF. After bashing his mirror into oblivion, and fucking himself up with more wounds to remove the resemblance, he feels a little better(?) and passes out. Towa doesn't understand why he feels this way, since it's not like he even knows who this woman is... He can't remember...

While being pissed off at Fujieda and idling in that little tunnel in the park, the man shows up again. It's like this is their romance hotspot. Anyways, Fujieda apparently has accepted Towa's offer to collab, so they return to Towa's room together and he returns his pocket watch. The two bitch and snark at each other for a bit and Towa demands his bunny back. Fujieda tells him the bunny's not his and that it had a name written on it, but Towa doesn't believe that. Fujieda also mentions how his mom's real name was Sakuragi Yuma apparently... and how Towa's name isn't in the official citizen register so it's probably not his real name either. Also he doesn't have a sister. There's no signs of any such person existing. Towa finds that stupid, so they move onto a different subject. Apparently he's found information on an ex-coworker of Maya's who might know something, so they head to this nice cafe where she works to find her. Oh yeah also some point during the convo Fujieda revealed that he got fired from the yakuza for being a nosey bitch. Rip to him I guess.

The lady, named Hasegawa, immediately goes pail upon hearing the name Maya and insists that they leave. Fujieda implores her to contact him if she ever changes her mind, saying that this case is linked to an aquaintance's little sister who had gone missing... Hmm wonder what that could mean. 

On their way home, yakuza try to kill Fujieda, so the two end up escaping to his private apartment. It got rainy on the way, so Towa immediately strips, causing Fujieda to look shookened upon seeing his sexy scars. Fujieda tries to leave to change his clothes in a bathroom, so Towa teases him about it. Pissed off and easily provoked, Fujieda responds by stripping right here...causing Towa to be the shooked one.

Hot damn the (ex)lawyer is shredded

Fujieda's body... it's sexy. But not only that, its also covered in SCARS. JUST LIKE TOWA. Towa had never seen another person with a body as fucked as his... though rather than slice and dice scars, it seems Fujieda's are more from like ... scraping and tearing and beating and maybe even burning who knows. Either way it looks bad. But in Towa's POV... bad = sexy. For the first time, he feels attracted towards the lawyer. He tries to immediately hit on him, but it falls painfully flat. To save the situation, Towa begins opening up about his strange nightmares about his scary mother and stuff. He also had dreams about another figure who was with him, who he instinctively recognized as his little sister, who was totally real by the way. Fujieda responds that they'll find the truth.

New and improved Fujieda

He walks him home like the gentleman he is, though he's changed into casual clothes and looks like a COMPLETELY different person now. Like, without the stupid hair and glasses, he could pass off for younger than Towa. In fact maybe he is? We just don't know. He also gave Towa some of his clothes as well, so Towa is in full boyfriend shirt when he shows up at the clinic to find Taku and Rei, who are justifiably confused. As usual, Fujieda is nosey as fuck and questions Taku about Maya, as well as Towa's real name. Towa for some reason instinctively doesn't want to know his real name, but his desperation for answers wins out. Taku finally fesses up, revealing Towa's real name as Sakuragi Haruto... As soon as he hears it, Towa gets horribly dizzy and gets knocked out cold. After waking up an hour later, of course Taku is still pissed about all this, but Fujieda does not give a single fuck, immediately asking if he's remembered any more useful info. He then gets a call that Hasegawa is ready to open up about her story, and tells Towa he'll come pick him up tomorrow to see her. 

The next day he does show up first thing in the morning, but alas... an ambulance comes in. Hasegawa was SHOT this morning by yakuza! Wow. Taku tells Fujieda that this is HIS fault. HE put her in danger!!! Fujieda feels bad, but he has more important things to think about. Clearly there really is a lot more to Euphoria than meets the eye. Hasegawa was not shot fatally, and still has the strength to speak. She tells them that she wants to tell her story, and that even if she died doing it, at least she could lighten the weight on her heart.

Apparently, Euphoria was a lot more than just a cabaret club. Euphoria was closely linked with human trafficking, bringing in sold youngsters and children to entertain the needs of crazy ass rich people. Euphoria dealt in a lot more than usual entertainment. It was an establishment meant to fulfill the most twisted and deepest desires within man... kind of similar to what Towa does with his Euphoria art sessions. Interesting. Anyways, Hasegawa was manipulated into working there, and is now kept under yakuza surveilance for the rest of her life so that she doesn't say anything. Sucks for her.

Fujieda shows Hasegawa a photograph of a girl, and asks if she knows the young lass named Yuzuki Mei. Hasegawa is immediately shooked. Apparently Maya was always particularly fond of a particular little boy and little girl, but one day they tried to run away. After they were caught and dragged back, Hasegawa never saw her again... she was probably killed. Fujieda doesn't take it very well and leaves. Meanwhile, Towa passes out again.

In his dreams he sees the girl called Yuzuki Mei...holding his hand... but then she's torn away from him, leaving nothing but that stuffed bunny...

who dis

As soon as he wakes up, he dashes outside, where its conveniently emo raining as it always is when its time to be emo. Back at the playground, he finds Fujieda by the little tunnel where they meet up so often. Fujieda's smoke has now turned a deep red...and he is overcome with sorrow. Blaming everything on Towa and using him as a replacement for his evil mother, he smacks the shit out of him and tries to strangle him.

Fujieda wet and wild

Realizing that death would be an easy way out for Towa and unable to think of a better punishment, he non-cons him... a little weird but okay. Towa finds the experience kind of fun, but that's probably not something he should say out loud. 

Next day, he contemplates how interesting it is that Fujieda's smoke changed color. While pondering this, he hears news that Fujieda Law Offices got blown the fuck up. He goes to ask Sakaki about it, and of course Sakaki's just like "The bitch was nosey. It was just meant to scare him a bit, but if he dies then that's that. Don't get close to him Towa, he's just out to use you." Like...of course he is. Towa and Fujieda are using each other... that was already obvious. In order to get Towa to stop trusting Fujieda, Sakaki spills some dirt on him. Apparently before he was a lawyer, he was a common whore. He used sugar mommy money to fund his way through law school, and now just does dirty work as a lawyer. Clearly he can't be trusted!!!! Sadly for him, Towa could not give less of a shit if someone's a whore or not... in fact, a whore and a slut have more in common than a lawyer and a slut. Works for Towa. Seeing Eiji on the way out, Towa asks him for help to break into the now sealed off blown up law office.

That night, he snoops around and finds it a mess, as was to be expected, but also finds Fujieda's still in tact notebook. Inside is a photograph of who is probably Yuzuki Mei... Just looking at her gives Towa a horrible headache, and he has a hard time registering her face... Anyways, Fujieda later contacts him and they meet up again, resulting in Towa giving up the notebook and photo. Fujieda refuses to apologize for his crimes against Towa, and Towa doesn't mind... he's more interested in Fujieda's smoke anyways, which has now turned into a pinkish color compared to his pristine white. (Angry red was just an angry thing so that's mostly dissipated by now I guess)

Aww baby Fujieda's in it too

Later on, Towa learns that Taku's been kidnapped?? And tells Fujieda that he can't meet up with him because he's going to meet the kidnapper. Of course it turns out to be Madarame, who had heard that Towa was trying to learn his forgotten past. He's just trying to help by luring him out here, using poor Taku and Rei(?? they're also here for some reason). He then attempts to beat the shit out of Towa for fun, before Fujieda comes to fight him as well. However Madarame is like a level 99 beast, so nobody can compare to him. Getting bored and thinking how Towa's changed, he ditches them, but not before telling Towa that right here was where the abandoned Euphoria is...

Since the injured people are more important, they leave exploring Euphoria for later. At home, Rei reveals they've been acting as a rat for Sakaki because of their dad's debt situation. Taku reveal's hes connected with Toono through the drug thing, and Madarame mostly kidnapped him to pressure Toono. He only also lured out Towa for funsies to kill time. What a hoe. Anyways, Taku still doesn't want Towa trying to learn his past, but he's come to accept that there's probably no stopping him now.

Next day, Fujieda and Towa go to explore the abandoned Euphoria... For some terrible idea, they split up, and check out different floors. Of course, the floor Towa is left on is the one that contains this extremely ominous hall with a super creepy ominous door at the end. Just looking at it gives him mega heebie jeebies.

this is totally a normal thing to have in a cabaclub

His whole bodie screams at him not to go inside, but curiosity killed the cat... He goes in and as soon as he looks at what's inside, his head splits and he passes out, having a vivid nightmare of his smiling mother going daijobu daijobu at him. When he wakes up, all of his memories are back. Vividly and painfully. He sees the room in pristine condition just as it was in the past... the room he was trapped in for his entire childhood... Fujieda FINALLY shows up to ask if he's DAIJOBU. To which Towa of course almost throws up and tells him to shut the fuck up. "don't say it", "don't say what? daijobu?" *towa throws up* LIKE BITCH GET THE HINT!!!! Fujieda is such a stupid baka sometimes. 

Towa is overwhelmed with the desire to tell Fujieda something, but the words... the words won't come out..

TOWA LOSES HIS MARBLES EARLY END

Towa struggles to bring out the words, to tell Fujieda about Yuzuki Mei, but in the process he becomes overwhelmed with the images of torture. His brain snaps, the daijobus overwhelm him, and he mentally becomes trapped in the memories of the past. Trapped in that room, as if he was still there... still serving customers...

-----------------

Okay so moving on, Towa struggles to tell Fujieda that he's remembered the truth. How he was his mom's prized 'product' and how he served customers here in this room. Yuzuki Mei was the girl he thought was his sister...but she wasn't. She was just a girl who was brought in to be a product with him, but she was killed for trying to escape with him. Maya... ordered for her death. Yuzuki Mei... is dead... Fujieda kind of already figured that, but what he didn't figure was that Towa was also a victim here. For some reason. Like bro you had HOW many hints in front of you? Yet he somehow didn't put two and two together that Maya was abusing her own son. Idiot. 

Towa finally remembers Mei's face

So Towa let's it all out. How the diary entries mailed to him were all the customers who came by and gave him his 'wounds'. How every day he was put to work by his mother to serve customers, where he'd be blindfolded and they'd do what they wanted with him. They'd slice, stab, slice and stab...whichever and whatever. And the entire time his mother would tell him 'everything's going to be daijobu.' Great. Towa also guesses correctly that Mei was probably Fujieda's sister... not his 'acquaintance's sister'. He feels bad that there was nothing he could do for her.

Fujieda is really shook at all this info, so he just ditches Towa here alone. Here in the place of his deepest trauma. Alone. Fujieda. My man. Get ahold of yourself you whore. 

Towa manages to make his way back home by himself, but all he can think about is Mei. Why is he alive, while Mei is dead? For the first time in forever, Towa feels GUILTY. And he's overwhelmed with the fact that his life has no meaning. This whole time he was copying his mother in seeking out people's desires in his 'euphoria time' or whatever... he even looks like the bitch to boot. He's trash and living a trash life, while Mei, light of his life, is dead. She taught him the will to try and run away. He'd never even considered leaving his mother before that. But then they actually tried, and now she's DEAD!!! 

Needing a quick fix of ANYTHING to make him feel better about being a piece of shit, he wanders out to find someone to beat him half to death and finds some nice shitbags to gang noncon him. FUJIEDA WHERE ARE YOU!! WHERE ARE YOU!!!!!! COME GET YOUR MAN THIS INSTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Towa practicing his extremely bad coping methods

Even after being put through such horrible pain, Towa still craves more... he needs to hurt MORE. Suddenly a light goes off in his head. He should just kill himself! What a great idea. He heads home and immediately pulls out all the canvases and paintings he has in the room and sets them up in a circle as if conducting some kind of bizarre ritual. He then douses himself in turpentine, and prepares to turn on his lighter to end it all right there and then. The door opens. Fujieda is there.

After an awkward moment, Fujieda's just like "...did you get my texts." Towa of course is like "No I couldn't give less of a shit right now." "I can see that." You are so funny Fujieda, even if you're an idiot. Anyways, Fujieda admits that he came looking for him because he was desperate to tell Towa how none of this is Towa's fault. Fujieda then opens his heart to him... telling the whole story about how he lived his whole life trying to find his baby sister. Apparently their mother sold her fore a quick buck, and he did everything in his power to find tracks of her ever since. Learning she was dead, it was like he'd lost all meaning to live, but still he perseveres.  Towa was just a victim in all this, but he blamed him... Fujieda wanted to apologize. Finally. 

Emo
Drama

He also tells Towa that death is just an easy way out. Mei died wanting Towa to live, so throwing his life away now would be disrespectful towards her. Now drop the lighter!!!! Towa finally complies and gives up his lighter, to which Fujieda activates big brother mode and begins giving him aftercare. He drags Towa to the shower to wash him, and is upset to see how much he looks like shit. Towa's also still leaking noncon juice from his back door, so Fujieda uses his ex-whore techniques to help clean him out. Towa demands Fujieda strip, since he wants to see his battered body to make himself feel better. Fujieda's the only other guy he knows with a body as fucked up as his after all... This goes to that, and they end up fucking passionately on the bed. For the first time in his life, Towa feels like he feels real pleasure from sex rather than... whatever it is he's been getting from it thus far.

They end up having another heart to heart and talk about how they're both kind of fucked up. Fujieda also asks Towa to rate his sex skills, and Towa jokes about telling him he's bad, but finally admits that it was 10/10. Fujieda says he will do his best to keep up his performance... he's so damn majime. Towa finds it endearing. Anyways, Fujieda opens up about how his parents were shitty AF, and how after they divorced, his mom would horribly abuse him and his sister. Almost all of his scars are from his mother. He never went to high school so that he could work and get money in a desperate attempt to get enough to move out with his sis, but too late. Mom sold her one day while he was out at work. Ever since, his life just completely went to shit as he ran from home and desperately began to look for his sister...becoming a whore and all that in the process. Mei was all he had... but Mei was strong. He wants to protect what she wanted to protect... AKA Towa. Also his real name is Yuzuki Minato, but he hates his parents so he likes his Fujieda name better. 

Towa also talks about how fucked up and broken he is, and how he feels about replicating his mother through his art subconsciously. Fujieda views his own scars as disgusting marks of abuse, but Towa views his as trophies that separate him from his abuse. Since these are his and not anyone else's. If that makes sense. Fujieda can't relate, but he respects Towa for his strength. Towa also talks about how his super seductive manipulation techniques were all things that were also drilled into him by his mother. It disgusts him how much of her teachings he's been using naturally even after getting amnesia. Anyways their conversation gets seriously deep and mushy.

idk why i find this picture really funny

Towa's decides to give living another shot, and Fujieda proposes to be... 'supporting each other partners' with him. They can support each other forever. Towa interprets this as asking to date him, and he accepts. Romance is alive...

Next day, Rei and Taku ask Towa why he has a weird art ritual going on in his room and why it smells like oil. He tells them that he tried to kill himself, which of course does not go well... but it's evident to everyone that Towa has changed overnight. For some reason, he seems like a huge weight has been lifted off his shoulders. After learning that he's remembered everything, Taku realizes that Towa has truly probably overcome his past somehow. He and Rei vow to always be there to support Towa. Oh yeah, also randomly there's news of how the Takasato HQ was attacked and that Toono and Sakaki are MIA. It was probably Madarame.

Still not satisfied with everything, Fujieda's next goal is to try to figure out who was mailing Towa all that ominous crap. Their clue is the diary entries, which were defs from Maya's diary. Towa, Taku, and Fujieda head to this one place to interview the nurse that took care of Maya in her last days after falling down the stairs, though Taku couldn't get any info out of her. Only that in her last moments, a man who was probably Sakaki was always hovering around her. Towa gets Rei to figure out Sakaki's location, and he goes with Rei to meet him... only to get punked by EIJI!??? Eiji uses sleeping gas to knock him out and kidnap him. Great. He was Sakaki's minion all along.

Towa wakes up tied and bound in the Red Room at the shithole abandoned Euphoria, where a recording plays of Maya's voice, telling young Haruto to be DAIJOBU. Towa feels like his heads gonna explode, and finds Sakaki staring at him. Apparently Sakaki was the one mailing him all that crap, because he'd made Maya a promise. In her last moments, she wrote down a plan to turn Towa into the next her, and now Sakaki is just following her post mortem orders. Though Sakaki mostly interpreted this plan as awakening Towa as Maya's reincarnation. BECOME MAYA, TOWA... Like... how? What the fuck. A little creepy. He decided to start mailing Towa pieces of Maya's diary if he ever killed someone while doing his Euphoria art sessions... which finally happened in the insanity ending of the vampire chapter. That's where this all began. Since killing someone showed that he was already close to who Maya was as a person... He plays the recordings and of course all it does is make Towa feel horribly mentally sick. He can't stand the voice of that daijobu daijobu bitch. Sakaki rants about how he tried to kill Fujieda because he was the brother of that DEVIL. Apparently both he and Maya viewed Yuzuki Mei as a devil who tempted young Haruto to the 'dark side'. Tainted by her evil wretched ways, spurning him to reject his holy mother. A little weird, but okay. Just kidding this is NOT OKAY!!! FAR FROM OKAY!!

Sakaki being just a wee bit fucking UNHINGED

He also mentions how it's only right that Towa take up the mantle of Maya, because he's the one who killed her after all. It's only right that he take responsibility. Towa clearly doesn't remember this part, but after some pushing it all comes back. After he'd realized that Maya killed Yuzuki Mei, he rejected his mother for the first time. In shock, she came at him with a knife... resulting in a chase where she stabbed him by the stairs. Towa ended up pushing her away to get the knife out, and she toppled down the stairs to her death. The distorted picture of himself reflected in her eyes haunted him for the 5 minutes he had before getting amnesia and forgetting all about it. Until now that is.

creepy

Somehow or other they end up in the hallway, where Fujieda finally shows up since he's always at the right place at the right time right when needed. Sakaki gloats about how he's the one who killed Yuzuki Mei, and how Maya believed she would have been happier anyways to have her wretched spirit separated from her child body. Uh... Anyways, Fujieda is basically put at a disadvantage after getting shot, while Towa is still tied up so there's not much he can do. Sakaki's about to finish him off when Fujieda looks Towa in the eye and tells him: You are Euphoria!!!! 

Towa gets what he means immediately... (what he means is as 'Euphoria', Towa has the ability to manipulate people's hearts, so he can use his wiles to make Sakaki cut his shit out)

Towa then pretends he's Maya to drop Sakaki's guard. Sakaki becomes ecstatic and is like OMG MAYA YOU'VE RETURNED!! YAYAYA!! Using honeyed words, ufufus and daijobus, the act is completely sold. But putting himself mentally into that space...Towa's mind slips deep into the act...

INSANITY END

Towa completely loses sight of himself and becomes some kind of hybrid Maya-Towa. As soon as he snaps and this change in his brain is sealed, he looks at Sakaki and says "you're not the one..." before butting him down the stairs to his death. The same stairs mom died falling down by the way. Fujieda ends up passing out from the bullet wound, but when he wakes up... Towa is gone. He goes back and spends a few days looking for him alongside Taku and Rei, but to no avail. Until it suddenly dawns on him how in those last moments, Towa was clearly overtaken with his mom impersonation. Fujieda RUSHES back to the abandoned building, back to the red room that Towa used to live in... where someone then knocks him the fuck out.

When he wakes up, Towa is there with him. But something about him is wrong. Something about him is extremely feminine, to the point Fujieda thought a woman was there in the room with him. Towa smiles gently, ufufus and insists that "yes, I'm Towa... and I want you, Fujieda." Completely overwhelmed with attraction to the succubus before him, Fujieda is completely caught in Towa's control. Unable to refuse, he takes Towa back with him to his apartment, where they have wild and crazy sex. Towa shows his body to reveal countless and countless of horrific wounds covering his skin... "I did all this because I couldn't wait for you any longer~~~~~~~" Fujieda is sickened, but also... turned on. It's complicated.

He may have an identity issue now but damn is he sexy while he does

He wonders... is this Towa? Or something else entirely? But after Fucking Towa satisfied... Towa whispers a quiet "save me"... damn. Fujieda decides that he will take responsibility and care for Towa for the rest of his life, regardless of what he's become. Someone has to be there for him, and it's gonna be him.

GOOD/TRUE END

So clearly none of that happens, and Towa remembers who he is before sinking too deep. After luring Sakaki into a false sense of security, Sakaki cuts Towa free from his bindings. He then pulls out the red hourglass Euphoria pocket notwatch that we've seen so often in the Euphoria sessions minigame and nightmare sequences. "This was yours, I've kept it safe for you all this time, Maya!!" Towa takes it and then YEETS it across the room. Sakaki is SHOOKED, he was played for a fool... and in his desperate attempt to catch the thing, he accidentally tumbles down the stairs to his death. These stairs are deadly. 

The red creepy pocket hourglass

Fujieda is a little shooked by the events that just happened, but everything's fine now. He and Towa go home to live happily ever after. 

With the Takasato group's in crumbles because of both Toono and Sakaki's deaths, it's probably only inevitable for the mainland to take back control of this city. Madarame skips town, Mayu and Kotaro also skip town, Eiji is missing, Rei makes up with their dad (??? why tho...), Taku decides to take responsibility for developing drugs, Roost's owner continues to do whatever he does, Rei's friends also continue to do whatever, everything's generally chill. Lisa (from Taku's route) shows up and introduces herself as a COP. Apparently both her and Eiji were undercover cops in Shinkoumi, looking for an opportunity to dismantle the yakuza's powerhold on the city??? Okay. She then delivers to them a package from Eiji. It's a black key card... Eiji video calls Towa and tells him that he was dead serious about helping Sakaki try to turn him into Maya, but that didn't work so whatever! Apparently Eiji really is just a shitty person and likes to do whatever entertains him. He was also feeding the mainland misleading information for years. What a bitch. Apparently he's in hot trouble now, so he hangs up and vanishes.

Towa and Fujieda go back to the manor and use the key card to unlock this one door in the building that had a key card lock... unlike the rest of the building, it's perfectly in tact and was clearly still being used. It's Sakaki's secret office, and it's covered in photos of Maya, just like any real obsessed stalker-type would. They find an album with Towa's birth in it... with his birthday written... the date opens the secret safe which contains Maya's diary. Most of it is the typical disgusting stuff of her horrible crime life, and apparently over 2/3rds of it are about the horrible things done to Towa. 

But in the back of the diary is an entry she write in her last moments probably at the hospital. It reads something like: I'm so lonely. I think about how I have a monster inside of me, but I can't suppress it's dark cravings. I am unable to love and unable to feel, but I imagine if that monster is killed that I'll be able to feel something. I love my baby boy and wanted to give him everything I had.. but no matter what, nothing would go through to him. I wonder if he can find a life different from mine..

Something like that. This bitch was batshit... anyways reading the entry, Towa cries for the first time in the entire game. My guess is he's processing that this crazy abusive woman had an extremely twisted love towards him, probably using her abuse to try to turn him into something akin to herself so that she wouldn't be alone anymore. Or something. Cool motive, still child abuse... Okay not even cool motive. What she needed was mental help, not any of this.

baby sheds tear for first time in life

A year or so passes and Towa moves in with Fujieda to be his malewife. Fujieda makes sure to keep his promise of supporting Towa forever, and taking responsibility for making him go through all that stuff, as he likes to put it. Towa likes to interpret it as them being boyfriends though. The two have a lovey dovey life, Towa paints Fujieda's portrait, and he decides he just doesn't feel like drawing anymore. It's chill time. He still has nightmares and has his moments... but even with that, Fujieda doesn't mind. He's always there at his side to support him...

In the last scene, Fujieda takes Towa to the beach and asks if he's been in the ocean before, to which Towa says no. Fujieda's all like, I've never stepped into the sea either.. experiences that are normal for most children were deprived from us, so I want to be able to experience every little thing with you from now on. Our childhoods were taken away from us, so I want to make new memories with you, together... AWWW HOW SWEET I CAN'T TAKE IT. They then cutely splash each other in the ocean... ah.. my heart.. it hurts.

Towa makes a :D face for the first time in his life

Okay jk there is ANOTHER scene. Towa and Fujieda live a very happy married life with Fujieda bringing home the bacon as a lawyer while Towa is his stay at home useless honey bunny. Apparently Fujieda is complete shit at cooking, and Towa is better even without ever having touched a spatula in his entire life. Also one day, Towa's weird rainbow filter smoke seeing vision abruptly stops. For a while he thinks somethings wrong with him, before learning that this is what being normal is supposed to be like. He then stops by this one snack shop he frequently visits that I forgot to mention this entire post so far, and sees this beautiful painting... Apparently this painting was the 'black painting' in the box at the beginning of this route, which Towa just couldn't see because of his fucked up vision. But now he can see it...

The painting that inspired Towa to go into art

Apparently when he was little, his mom took him to an art gallery where he fell in love with the painting. She then promised to buy it for him, and he became interested in drawing and art from then on, though he never saw the painting again... well here it is! No more loose ends.

Fujieda's portrait: Equal
you can tell the art block starting to hit



THE END

o(--< Man...

>--)o

I don't know how to feel.. Anyways I sure hope I didn't forget anything. 

FINAL THOUGHTS AND CONCLUSIONS

Okay so... I just don't know how to feel... My mind tells me this was probably a good VN, but I don't know how to process it all. Like honestly I didn't enjoy Taku or Rei's routes that much except the funny bits like Towa dressing in milf cosplay or when he seduced a guard or when he was just being funny in general. Madarame's route was fun though. And Fujieda's route... it's just plot after plot after plot they just beat you over the head with the story bat until the game ends. No room to think.

Thinking smart-wise, I feel Taku and Rei route shows like Towa I guess moving on with his life I guess, though he never comfronts his past ofc... But he doesn't necessarily need to. He's functioning I guess. With them it really felt like he was settling. They love him, so he's like okay sure! Boywife time. Easy as pie. It's just like that, simple. He accepts people's love, but I don't really see him as actually... experiencing the love really. He's just living I guess. He's capable of getting embarassed clearly but I dunno it really just felt like he was settling.

I found Madarame route interesting since it's such a contrast from the rest. Unlike the others where he still like... lives his life as before, Madarame's is one about completely abandoning the past to live in the present. He just cuts off every last connection he has to his traumatic past  and anyone who could have known about it. It's just all gone. He throws it to the wind to start anew with Madarame in America(??) and other countries lol... I found it very interesting. In that route, it's the only one where Towa just kind of starts to get over his problems like his discomfort towards silence... for whatever reason being with Madarame was comforting enough for him to not have that problem anymore?? And nightmares didn't really come up as much either. Is it because he's become so far removed from his previous life? Hmmm much to think about. Anyways Madarame was kind of a really shitty guy but I liked him with Towa.. hehe.

[EDIT: Okay this only really crossed my mind later lol while listening to the ost in my car bcuz my car's old so I can only play anime cds, but like the whole insanity end in Madarame's route I realized... like it's showing how Towa is still falling into his old habits of emulating Maya and trying to 'unwrap' people kinda like he was trained to do. Like he moved on from most of his past self and was reverting back to his 'free-spirited living life free' self but his attachment to doing the Euphoria stuff shows part of him was still chained to his trauma? Maybe? Am I reading too deep into this. Anyways I just think it's a little meaningful that the good end for Madarame has him dropping that too, figuring there isn't any meaning to what he was doing... the last step before putting his whole past behind him.. I guess. Does any of that make sense. Whatever. //Edit ends here]

Speaking of, Taku really makes me wonder. When exactly did he become acquainted with Maya and Towa? Why was he allowed custody of him? Maya's business was still ongoing when Taku was in university with Asakura... and it must have taken him a few years to complete medschool and become Toono's cooperator after that. At the time Towa was described to be a little boy. He's a little boy in the photo Taku has of him. He said he got it when he went to a restaurant with Maya. When? Where? The BG in the photo looks like the red room if you ask me. What's going on here... It's implied from what I can tell that Towa kills his mother when he was in middle school, and that he was probably some years older than Mei. Maybe. From Hasegawa's description it feels like they were both kids? But since he killed his mother as soon as Mei died, and Mei is always depicted as a child, they probably had a gap between them? Hasegawa looks super young though... when was all this. They mention the store as having been open 10ish years ago I think, but 10 years ago Towa was 16. Hmm. I guess that goes together relatively. Where does Taku come in though. Toono wasn't involved with Euphoria I think, since it was mostly Sakaki who looked over it. Taku works for Toono... though I guess it's still all the Takasato group. Either way... overall I don't think of Taku too fondly because I feel it's hard to forgive his involvement in all this. I can't say if it was good or bad for him to deny Towa his past, though seeing how horrible it was it's understandeable why he did all that. Anyways maybe he got the photo from someone else because he's obsessed with Towa lol.... IDK

TL;DR I'm confused. 

[EDIT: Okay thinking about it I think the most reasonable answer is probably: Taku was put in med school by Toono at least 15+ yrs ago. Taku's mom died and he turned delinquent around the same time when Asakura first met Towa. Towa was a child at the time so he was at least 9-11 or something, which would make this ~17ish yrs ago. I'm assuming Taku's delinquent phase was wrapped up within a year and he finished med school somehow to start working for the Takasato group to pay off his debt to Toono. As a doctor he probably was noticed by Sakaki and put to work in Euphoria since Maya wanted a private doctor for Towa since he was getting sliced up all the time? That's my guess... I feel it would make sense. Towa was actively working as a product since he was at least 10 and maybe even younger I'm assuming, and stopped working when he was 16. So we can guess Taku uhhh I'm just throwing random shots in the dark here but let's say he was assigned to be his personal doctor when Towa was like 13, which could be when the baby photo was taken. He looks kinda 13 in it? Maybe 12? Either way that photo must have been taken while Taku was working there. We know Taku watched over as a comforting figure for Towa as noted by Towas dreams in Taku's route, so we know he was his personal doctor. This probably gave Taku leverage to become Towa's guardian after Maya died when Towa was 16ish. When Euphoria closed, Taku probably opened his own private clinic then and I guess he got back in contact with Toono? Sakaki already knew Taku was one of Toono's people but I guess he didn't care much since he could use him too and never considered Toono a threat? I guess? Okay that's just my reasoning here. Case closed!]

Okay for Fujieda, he's rad. I feel it doesn't come across well in my plot dump but he has funny banter with Towa and they have good chemistry. Towa has a sharp eye and is good at reading people, but Fujieda's just majime, straight-forward, empty headed, stubborn, and stupid. But he's also honest to a fault and extremely narrow minded when it comes to achieving his goals. He's also a stupidly good person, being the only character who doesn't have a becomes nasty bad end. After what he went through, he's just so honestly supportive towards Towa, even if he took it out on him at first... He's young too... I feel he fits the bill for a good shoujo manga love interest. I like when he enters big bro mode, since he's good at taking care of others. Even back when he didn't like Towa, he took good care of him when Towa was piss drunk... I felt the noncon scene was a little random though, but I get this is a yaoi game. I still feel like I could have gotten more out of all this, and part of me doesn't feel completely sated, but I am just naturally always unsatisfied so I should get over it.

Hmmm yeah... like romance wise I don't feel affected at all. But Towa-brain wise... I just think of each route in erms of how good it is for Towa... Fujieda is clearly the absolute best choice, but Madarame's is good too... in a kind of... y'know... not normal typical way. Okay I'm probably biased, I just like the guy. Rei's was kind of boring, no offense... And Taku's... Taku doesn't deserve Towa ngl. I'm sorry daddy but that's just the facts.

Last note, I really wish they gave us Fujieda's exact age. I'm just too curious... So Towa is 26, Rei went to middle school with him so either they were the same grade or different, but I'm assuming same grade so same age. Taku is 47, Madarame's in his 40s according to a comment Mayu(? I think) made, and Fujieda is described as looking 'young enough he could be younger than me' by Towa. And we know He's Mei's older brother and that Mei was younger than Towa by who knows how many years...

Man... I think it's kinda romantic though how Fujieda falls for the guy who also thought of his sister as a little sister... something about that is kind of sweet.

Oh yeah also I feel the game had way too much leniance towards parents. Like Rei trying to be nice towards dad like... your dad SUCKS!!! He 'worked with Towa's parents' before, y'know what that means? He could have been involved in the buying of Mei and selling her to Euphoria. Rot in hell bastard. Also I guess I can be sympathetic towards how fucked in the head Maya was but she was literally pure evil, so... yeah. Begone witch... Okay yeah I think that's everything.

Also when I mentioned I cried once, it was during the scene when Fujieda convinces Towa to not kill himself... I dunno something about their talk was very touching to me. *sheds single tear* He's suuuper awkward and like, even during that scene he was quite awkward, but his feelings are genuine... Towa was moved by that... sweet... hope they are happy together.

Whew after typing all that though I think I really got this game out of my system! Plot dumping really works... now I can move on with my life. Goodbye friends. ^^

BONUS:

One thing I really liked about the game is how the start screen changes after each ending. I'll post them all here to show since I just thought it was neat!

0 routes done
1 route done
2 routes done
3 routes done
everything done! yay!

This looks like a metaphor for what it feels like to finally get therapy after a long time of struggling.... just kidding. I wouldn't know, I haven't had therapy.


BONUS BONUS:

[update 3/14] Okay I finally finished reading the short story that came with my copy of the game lol so I might as well summarize it here. Note it contains spoilers so yeah tho if you reading this far in this post I'm gonna assume you prly kno the spoilers by now.

The short story covers the POV of one of Towa's old classmates from middle school who was friends with Rei. Rei at the time wasn't friends with Towa yet but liked to gush about him so the nameless NPC classmate was like damn he gay for him... or whatever. But anyways, NPC man holds a dark secret. At the time he'd pretended he only knew Towa in passing but the truth was that he once had an encounter with him that he'd rather forget... Apparently after middle school, his parents had him move back to the mainland to study for college and to get married, so that's what happened. He became a very normal married hetero man with child. But one day he returns to Shinkoumi and catches sight of Towa in passing. He recognizes him immediately even though Towa now has a lot more scars than he used to...

So in those 4 seconds he has a full on flashback to the memory he wishes to forget... Apparently back in school, one day it was raining like hell after class let out. He took refuge in the school library, which was completely empty, but then heard some noises coming from a back room. On further investigation he discovered... FUCKIGN!!?!? IN SCHOOL!?? While he couldn't tell at first, he soon realizes these two are MEN. Even though he grew up full on heteronormative, the sight gets him turned on... He can't even tell who these people are. But he is a boy in puberty. No helping it. After a while, the top suddenly gets up and attempts to escape at full speed, so NPC boy quickly hides... after, he goes to see what the fuck happened, only to find TOWA staring him dead in the eyes while spreading his legs...!?? Since he couldn't tell who was bottoming earlier but yeah now its obvious... So Towa's just like *fufufus* "I felt you watching me so I told the guy and he ran away... I'm not satisfied yet tho.. wanna help? :)" and the NPC boy is like... thunder strikes his head. It feels like he looking right down into the gaping devil's maw. He then turn tails and DASHES outta there as if his life at stake.... and even though it raining cats and dogs outside and he gets drenched, he still feel like his whole body is on FIRE. 

Anyways back to the present he just like... damn if I touched Towa I just KNOW I would've fallen... Got pulled into his depravity... he the type who can ruin any man just by touching them. I can tell by instinct. Part of him is tempted to try to get back in contact with Rei to meet Towa one more time, but his reasonable side is like that is a horrible idea??? Don't do that. SO he doesn't, and decides to rush back to his heteronormative wife and child, far away from Shinkoumi... 

THE END

There you go. Wasn't that fun. Oh yeah also it listed some interesting details about how Towa apparently used to always be on leave from school because of 'illness' or something, but started attending again after his mother passed. Many people assumed his reckless slut behavior was related to that somehow, but no one knows the truth... Also he barely ever attended class and ditched most of the time, probably to go smoke somewhere or fuck people. What a bad student. This just shows his mom didn't value his education tho... let your damn kid go to school. This info probably what the spoiler warning was talking about.... lol. Also there was a horny insert illustration of  young student Towa spreading his legs baring it all but I'll just let you imagine what that was like since I can't show that here... too scandalous.

[Update 6/15/2022]

ANOTHER UPDATE!!! My god it's been over a year since I played this game. Anyways, I bought the artbook because of course and only got it around now since I only wanted to get it if I was importing other stuff from Japan to save shipping... anyways. It came with some fun facts I wanted to share.

First of all there was a character design image of Towa's mom. Finally a clear image of her. So behold:

she really does look identical to Towa... it all makes sense now

Besides that, there was a post Fujieda route short epilogue story that was really cute so I'll summarize it <3

Basically it covers how life starts to get monotonous after Towa moves in with Fujieda. For one, he goes to work all day and passes out as soon as he comes home... Towa does all the housework and makes dinner too, and they always eat together and Fujieda loves his food <3 Also, since Towa has a lot of free time with Fujieda busy, he started working part time at Roost. Everyone is doing well and apparently Fujieda is also helping Taku as his lawyer for all his legal troubles. The girls bug Towa to bring Fujieda some time but he still hasn't done that haha. Anyways, life is peaceful.

But still... nothing really happens in this peaceful life, which leaves Towa wondering how Fujieda actually thinks of their relationship. What even is their relationship? Like Fujieda said before, they had a 'supporting each other' bond, but WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. They were supporting each other. Is that it? They're not lovers... they haven't fucked since that time in Fujieda's route... does Fujieda not want to fuck him anymore because their relationship is about supporting each other in a wholesome way??!? Also now and then when they make eye contact, Fujieda LOOKS AWAY!!! WHY DOES HE DO THAT!! Towa can't see smoke anymore so he can't lifehack his way through it, but with his intuition he can tell its not that the guy is upset with him or doesn't like his company.... so what is it? What's his problem.

One day at dinner time, Fujieda is still acting a little akward before saying that he has the next 3 days off work, then asking Towa to pick a place to go out together to. A date!? Of course Towa's like what's this all about... but he agrees to think of a location he'd wanna go to. He tells Fujieda to relax for tonight since he's probably tired and says he can draw the bath for him, but Fujieda insists that he'll do it himself... Towa's like... I get he wants to be like equals but can't I at least do these housewife things for him... what's the big deal.

After they both bathe (separately of course) Fujieda once again avoids Towa's gaze, which makes Towa ask him what's up. "What's your problem? If there's something you wanna say, just ask!" And of course... FUJIEDA HAS NO IDEA WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT. HE HAS NO AWARENESS... HE WASN'T AWARE HE WAS DOING IT... cuz his head is full of air. Fujieda changes the subject to ask Towa what he thinks of their relationship. It turns out, he's also been questioning the state of things here. Apparently he wants to support Towa, but is starting to wonder if Towa was happier just doing whatever outside... like sure he's calmer and chiller now, but is he happier? What's really best for him... is Fujieda forcing him into a dull lifestyle? Is he... god forbid... hooking up with old friends at Roost? Not that that'd be a big deal of course since Towa is an adult and can do whatever he likes.

Towa of course is like "bruh... I haven't wanted to sleep with anyone since moving in with you and turn down all my old fuck buddies... Also I'm pretty content living with you. If I wasn't, I wouldn' wait for you to come home everyday." Basically. 

Towa also gets Fujieda to admit that the reason why he keeps avoiding his gaze is because he gets a strange feeling when looking at Towa... "It was the same back when I first met you too... there was a strange feeling... of ... of how ero you are >< But back then I thought it was just because you were that kind of person... but now just seeing you drink wine I think it's ERO!!! TT_TT I'm so disrespectful *head in hands*" And Towa is like what the fuck. Fujieda is so... lol. Towa lets Fujieda know that that's all fine because that obviously means he just wants to fuck him... and the feeling is mutual. "Actually, I want to fuck you right now tbh." He says. And Fujieda's like eh... eh. Doki.

Well this goes to that and they decide to bang. But Fujieda is intent on being the one servicing, so he not only eats Towa's ass, but also thoroughly massages his nipples as well. Very interesting. Towa is very inexperienced when it comes to this kind of foreplay so... well he has an interesting time to say the least. They then decide that their relationship can upgrade into a 'wanting to know more about each other' relationship. Since they're both so interested in the other... PLEASE JUST BE LOVERS ALREADY WHY GO THROUGH ALL THIS. Anyways. They also start going off about how much they've learned about each other since hooking up. Like Fujieda learning how good Towa is at being a housewife... how he has a good sense for cooking and house chores and managing things... Towa tells him to stop since it's embarassing. Anyways, Towa mentions how airheaded he's found Fujieda! How he accidentally uses Towa's toothbrush sometime and keeps forgetting to turn off the lights and can't cook... Fujieda's shooked since he doesn't remember any of that. Towa finds it especially endearing since Fujieda gave such a majime first impression, but he's actually an aihreaded dork!! Same though. Kya what a lovey dovey couple.

Fujieda then asks Towa if he's decided on a place to go, and Towa of course is like oops I completely forgot about that... Fujieda decides that he wants to take Towa to the amusement park on the mainland!! He's never gone before!! And turns out Towa's never gone either!! Since it's far though, they will have to book a hotel to thoroughly enjoy it. Towa's just like 'two guys at the amusement park tho...?' And Fujieda's like "Hm? Is there something wrong with that? :)' And Towa's like lol... He finds it cute though how when it comes to these things Fujieda's smile is so childlike... <3

THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok that's it for real. /update ends here


---------------------------------------


Anyways besides all that, look at this sexy acrylic stand I got with my copy... Yes I got the n+c store super tokuten... how could I resist? I love you Towa you are the light of my life

kyaaaa moe... TT_TT doki dokyuun



70 comments:

  1. I came across your review by chance and boy .... was it a delight 😂🤌 Your personal observations were cracking me up and I slmost forgot about why I was reading a review of this game. I just enjoyed reading your review so much, made my week, thank yew 💕

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  2. I had so much fun reading your review bc of your hilarious and very, personal comments, love it!! I hope you had as much fun playing and writing as I had reading this :)

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  3. I think this is the best review of anything I've ever read lolol I came across it on google after getting kinda bored with the story b/c this VN is so plot heavy, but now I actually wanna go back to it :O

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    1. Omgg you should seriously finish it... some scenes really hit harder when you get to them in game rather than reading a summary lol. It's true tho it's soo plot heavy.. it can be hard trudging thru it all so I feel you, but I'll be rooting for you!

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  4. aaaa thank you for your review!! it was really fun to read and i really enjoyed the funny comments X'D
    i needed more input to fill in some gaps after completing the game with my limited understanding of japanese ;w; it was really a long journey to complete the game and it made me feel empty after that... O<-<

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    1. I'm glad my summary could be useful! xD Ya the game is sooo crazy so like... when you're done... defs get you with that empty feeling. When's n+c's next game huh.. lol jk

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  5. This is really the most detailed review in English that I found. I also played this game immediately after it was released. And "Beautiful" is the first word I could come up with to describe it. It's an art work. I just felt like watching a movie in the scene of fighting with Sakaki in Euphoria in Fujieda Route, which benefits from its outstanding dynamic performance (演出, I mean). Three months have passed since full complete but my heart is still trapped in Shinkoumi.

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    1. Ya this really does feel like a piece of art... Definitely one of the most impactful BL games I've read for sure. The writing was sooo good T_T I was totally immersed... Just talking about it is bringing back all the memories already. The climax to Fujieda route was SO intense, I remember not being able to stop reading at all. Wish I could forget what happened so I could read it all again. Maybe my heart's still in Shinkoumi too, I still find myself being reminded of Slow Damage from the randomest things in my daily life haha.

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    3. I have been fascinated by Fuchii Kabura's scenario for so long. I remembered there's a sentence "空から絶え間なく降り注ぐ雨の線。そのイメージはトワの頭の中で、藤枝の体に刻まれた無数の傷痕に変化する。"in Fujieda Route which really amazed me. In Fujieda Route I had the same feeling with you while playing. And I found it quite funny to see many players couldn't stop until the end of their pillow talk like me. And I was also touched by the beautifulness when Fujieda and Towa were hugging together in the mansion with the song Lullaby. It reminded me of a scene in Lamento.

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    4. Yeah a lot of the narrative was almost poetic... I don't remember the contents that detailed but I do remember being moved. I can imagine most players would feel the same way being unable to stop! Fujieda's route was seriously too compelling... I cried at that ending scene haha, it was very moving. I actually haven't read Lamento yet, but I really should get to it one of these days.

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    5. Ya you definitely should. In fact, all four previous work of Nitro+Chiral worth playing. Lamento used to be my favorite BL game until Slow Damage. And Slow Damage, to me, looked like a ver2.0 Togainu no Chi at my first sight as these two games share some similarities in story background and elements.

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    6. Haha I also thought Slow Damage seemed similar to Togainu when the initial promotional materials first came out. I was happy since I liked Togainu's aesthetic, but after reading Slow Damage I'm pretty glad how different they really are. All of N+C's games are so different.. makes me wonder what they'll do for the next one. I will definitely have to finally read Lamento some time though... I know it's a lot of people's favorite. 🤔

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  6. I wish I could see young towa uwu. Anyway thankyou for the review!!! I want to buy the game but I can't :( And I looked for all their CGs since I love their arts especially Towa. Your fun review made my day~

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    1. Thanks for reading, and glad you enjoyed! :D

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  7. This was literally the best thing ever thank you for writing this 😭 Spent two hours in my room just digesting this, and when it got to the end of Fujieda's section I actually cried- I can't wait to play the actual game now omggg

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    1. Omg I'm happy you liked it so much! Yeah the experience when reading it yourself though is wayyy more like.. intense lol, so hopefully you can play it someday!

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  8. Does anyone know where I can read the game or like watch a gameplay of it in english? 😭 Btw, your summary and opinion was amazing!!!

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    1. JAST BLUE has the rights to the game and said they were working on an English release, but so far there hasn't been any news of any release date... but it should be somewhere over the horizon... someday... haha, thanks for reading my summary tho! :)

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  9. Wow nice review, I really enjoyed it, so far the lawyer Fujieda is my favorite, so he's the true endgame then?
    I know he's the only one with scars (aside from towa) but are these panels him? The post they were in confused me and I just want make sure if it is him
    https://i.warosu.org/data/jp/img/0335/27/1615043445835.jpg
    https://i.warosu.org/data/jp/img/0335/27/1615043517048.jpg

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    1. Ya Fujieda is 100% True endgame!! His route was the most definitive by far I think. He's also my favorite! <3

      Yes those images are of him ^^ In that bad ending he has more scars than he normally does because Towa gave them to him.

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  10. Thank you so much for this review! Your commentary was hilarious and really thorough. After reading your post, I think Madarame is also my favorite (what can I say, I'm weak to yakuza boyz) and it's cute that they both have a kinship in being fucked up.... uwu.... Fujieda does seem v sweet although I think I liked him more when you had the picture of him without the glasses LMAO oh well. Such an interesting game!! Really so many great moments in this post, I had a great time reading it. <3

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    1. Thanks so much for reading! Yeah Madarame is sooo great... even though he's kind of shitty he's just such a bad boy haha, can't resist... xD And ya Fujieda's defs way hotter without the whole lawyer cosplay on... Luckily the glasses are just for show to make himself look smarter so he usually doesn't need them ^^

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  11. Is it definitely necessary for PC to have Core i5 and Windows 8.1/10 to play this game?😢 Because my PC is an outdated one,CPU is core i3 and OS is window 7. 😫😫

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    1. I don't know much about computers so I'm not that sure... you could always try anyways and if it doesn't work just hold onto the game until you can get a better computer 😅 good luck...

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    2. Thank you for the reply, dear~ Because I'm not a gamer, just an otaku and fujoshi, I don't need such high performance PC to read manga and watch anime. But it can't be helped in this case *sighs*, must buy a new one to play this awesome game. And your review makes me want to play this game more, as quickly as possible. 😁😁

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  12. i am leaving a comment here since both me and my friend skimmed ur review and were starved for slow damage content we could understand in english... but in taku's route, he liked towa's mom right? (at least he thought he did until towa flirted the homosexuality out of him) and he was also the one who took care of towa as a kid, while his mom was alive, and was the one who tried so hard to hide the past from towa. Not to mention in his insanity route he drugged towa into staying with him so bad as to 'not let him go back to that place outside' or smthn like that. I feel like Taku's involvement needs to be fleshed out more, or maybe im dumb and i cant connect the pieces together? bc taku mustve known that towa was being hardcore abused as a child and didnt do anything? im not sure but i just want some understanding in this T-T I hope the eng version comes soon bc this game sounds so good

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    1. Hello, thanks for commenting! ^^ Ya I hope the English version comes out soon.. how long does JAST have to take ToT lol... anyways, ya Taku 100% knew about Towa's past abuse and that's why he was keeping it a secret from him. It's never clarified how Taku actually felt about Towa's mom, but for me personally I don't think he liked her that way. If I remember right he says he just respected her for the hustle but honestly I think he was just putting things lightly since he didn't want to tell Towa anything that would remind him of the past. Since Taku was basically owned by the yakuza after he was put in debt to them, I'm pretty sure he was forced into being Towa's personal doctor as part of his service to them and that's why he wasn't able to do anything about it. In general he wasn't in a position that could help Towa so he makes himself feel better by at least trying to look out for him after becoming his 2nd guardian kind of. So his involvement is just like a reluctant passive observer? Like he knows everything that happened but he didn't do anything about it, so I'm sure he feels complicated about it. My guess is he doesn't want Towa to remember not just for Towa's sake, but for his own as well because he doesn't want to feel responsible for letting it happen. Maybe. In general he doesn't take an active role in trying to stop Towa's destructive behavior in most routes, and I'm guessing it's because he doesn't feel like he has the right to intervene, as he never did in the past. Probably. Except in his insanity end of course where it goes badly haha.. anyways this is all just speculation. Can't wait for the English release since ya I'm sure a lot more people will discuss it also xD

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  13. ¿Donde podría descargar o comprar el juego? 👉👈

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    1. I don't speak Spanish so I hope you don't mind an English reply ^^;

      Anyways, if you want to play the game in English, Jast will be publishing it sometime in the future. Here is their website: https://jast.blue/index.html

      To play it right away, your only choices would be in Japanese. You can purchase the game digitally on Fanza and Dlsite, both which are in Japanese but google translate can help. They accept some foreign credit cards though I'm not too sure about the details. You'll have to figure it out haha.
      Anyways here are the websites:
      https://www.dlsite.com/pro/work/=/product_id/VJ014005.html
      https://dlsoft.dmm.co.jp/detail/hobe_0495/

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  14. Tofu! It was a pure joy reading your plot! (I also enjoyed your writing style!)

    I came across to your blog post when I didn't know what to do after Rei's part. Few days ago I finished the game.
    I decided to not to read your post until I'm not finished with the whole game.

    In my entrie life I played just 2 BL games. ( I'm soo picky.) I was in love with Sweet Pool. Maybe, a half years ago I played the game again after long years and I felt a terribble emotional pain, again... I tried to find the manga and novels to ease it. Sadly realised that Sweet Pool manga never will be finish. :-(
    After, I noticed Slow Damage. At first I was like "No more games to my weak heart" :-D but Towa's appereance, and the short plot hooked me.
    So, I got the game.

    At first when I started to play I thought the game would be different what now I know about it.
    But no matter, I loved the game!
    I don't feel like that it gave me the same black hole what Sweet Pool did.
    Now, I just feel a little empty...
    I will definitely play the game again when JAST BLUE release it in English. (There are some bad ends which aren't played yet. ;-) )

    It was a masterpiece after for years from Nitro+.
    Just add a little bit of tiny negative comment, for me, at Fujieda's route,
    I don't know, I didn't like that Madarame "dissappeared".
    I thought that Rei and Taku had some (romantic) feelings for Towa but this wasn't revealed or developed. (Maybe it was just me who looked these into that. :-D ) ...I wanted more jealous parts... :-D
    I would have stretched the story a little more, twisted the threads at Fujieda's part. It seemed like for me the end of the game was a bit quick with the closing.
    But Towa's happiness, well, I cried.
    I was happy for him!
    I won't be insatiate, it was beautiful. 😌

    Thinking about the story after the days, (I hope I didn't misunderstood something because of the japanese language difficulties)
    when we reached Fujieda's part,
    I think the before routes
    (Rei's, Taku's and Madarame's) were dreams too of Towa's. (And of course he had bad dreams in these dreams...)
    What do you think about it,
    can it be or am I looking more in into it?
    (Oh, and there were no mention about Towa's eye at Fujieda's part. 🤔)

    Anyway,
    thank you for your hard work Tofu to submit your opinion and the game experience with us! <3

    (p.s.: Do/Did you play with Slow Damage Clean Dishes?)

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    1. Thanks for reading my blog post! I'm glad you enjoyed it :D Yeah I really enjoyed this game and thought it was definitely a lot more... not soul crushing compared to Sweet Pool haha. Sweet Pool is good but personally I like happier stories... Though Slow Damage isn't necessarily 'happy', it did feel hopeful at least in the good endings, which I appreciated!

      I can see what you mean by feeling like Rei and Taku still have feelings for Towa in the other routes, and it was implied they were pretty upset about him hanging around Fujieda so much in that route, though it would have been fun to see more of that.

      I didn't really think about the other routes being dreams or anything, I just took it at face value as alternate realities or something haha. If you like that kind of story telling though I would recommend trying out Hashihime. I made a blog post on that too and like to shill it when I can xD

      I haven't played Clean Dishes but I wanted to! I was just feeling lazy and haven't looked into how to read it yet... it's on my list of things to get to someday though haha.

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  15. excuse my silly question, how did you open the extra stories? (i followed some guide so I'm not familiar with the gameplay)

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    1. By extra stories do you mean the short stories I summarized at the end of the post? If so, those were physical published materials that were released, so they aren't included in the actual game.

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  16. HELLO thank you for the review, it really helps me to ponder the decision to buy this game or not

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    1. I'm happy I could help with my review! Thanks for commenting xD

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  17. AAAAAAAAAAAAAA your review is so fun XD
    This is the best thing I've ever seen... i cannot help but read this several times
    Reading this reminded me of the first time i played the game... cuz your thoughts are quite similar to mine haha
    Thank u for writing!

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  18. I made an account just to comment... I had a blast reading this!! I was worried I wouldn't find many posts about SD since it came out relatively recently (in English at least) so this was a pleasant surprise. I loveee a good longform review and this scratched that itch perfectly. Thanks!

    I agree with nearly everything you said. It was uncanny reading my exact thoughts while playing the game lol. I also really enjoyed your sense of humor and voice. The image captions were super funny. I don't know if you plan on reviewing the other n+c titles but I'll definitely be on the lookout!

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    1. Wowie so glad you liked my post!! Hehe honestly I'm hoping more people come find my post since it's out in English now... xD

      Out of all the n+c games the only one in my backlog right now is Lamento, though I dunno when I'm ever gonna get around to that so don't expect too much!! (The others I already read before I started my blog haha, but who knows maybe I'll reread them someday)

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  19. Daaaamn I just played this game and I had to search up for help since I got stuck once and thats how I found your post. I gotta say I kinda agree with you some parts and in others don't. But I reeeaaallly loved how you described it all because even if I understood the game, your view made mine wider and I understood more because of it. Thankyou for this!!
    UI: It's weird to see how many people played this game and liked it, since it has lot's of gore and controvesial stuff but at the same time I'm happy because they see that this genre has it's viewers even if it's bloody so they'll maybe make more (I really liked sadistic blood for example bc of it's gore visuals). I'M JUST HAPPY there are people weird like me :D

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    1. Just another UI when I saw the beach scene I was literally flappin my arms and making squirmy noises like I was soooo happy for them. Weird to think that I've never been with someone who made me have this feeling... Like I just wanna be happy like them C':

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    2. Haha I'm glad you enjoyed my post! There's defs an entire market for dark edgy bloody guro violence romances out there, so don't be too surprised this game is popular... while I think this game was n+c's best yet, their past games speak for themselves on that front xD
      But yeah, don't feel too down about your feelings and just live vicariously through anime romance!!! Honestly I think a lot of people feel that way so don't mind it too much lol

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  20. Have I saved this game review or have this game review saved me?

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    1. lmao not sure what you mean but hope it's a good thing!

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  21. I have some time nowadays to catch up on this game after I got it few years ago.
    I didn't know the Eng ver was just released untill I read the comments lol.
    I'm on Taku route right now and so far Towa is the biggest mood of a BL main char, man just legit doesn't give a shit about anything untill he finds something interesting.

    I've been following your blog for quite a few years now and I've always loved the way you describe things.
    It's also funny because it takes me years to start a visual novel and years to finish it but I always come back to your blog once in a while.
    I still need to finish UUULtraC because I haven't progressed much since last time lol.

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    1. Oh and reading VNs like these and manga made my Japanese improve a lot as well, I remember back when I played Omega Vampire I thought the Japanese in this game was pretty difficult.
      So it always feels nice guage your improvements.

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    2. Omg it means a lot to me that you come back to my blog! xD And yeah I love Towa SO much, he is just so funny. Probably one of my favorite VN protagonists ever I think. And I totally feel you on improving your Japanese though, the more of these VNs I read the better I get so it's really fun in a way to feel that progress!

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    3. Ya it makes you feel so acomplished.

      I just finished Taku route.
      Why am I even surprised that someone nice and stable like Taku would turn yandere, cuz of course the nice guy is the yandere.

      Stories like this where it's mostly plot and not much romance gives me a little mellow and melancholic feeling (underneth all the agnst and existential crisis that comes with the plot, the type that makes you lay down on the bed and stare at the ceiling.)

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    4. Haha yeah Taku turning out yandere was soo like... as soon as he dropped the first hint I was like oh boy I see where this is going x'D

      Yeah being so plot heavy gives a lot to think about, but I still find that enjoyable! Gives you a lot to think about... and they can be more grounded than the VNs focused on passionate love lol, though yeah it's nice to find a story that can capture the best of both worlds. Looking at the kind of person Towa is though, I totally get why the romance is so lacking in this game haha.

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    5. I'm playing Rei route right now and the father is so disgusting.
      How could someone be so thick-skinned act all father like when clearly he's done nothing a father should've done.

      Also I think it's kinda funny how Taku and Rei are kinda Towa's dad and mom respectively.

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    6. And ya, this vn is a lot more chill in the sense that there aren't any passionate screaming, mega climax with explosions etc etc... but the plot and the characters emotions... they kinda seep into you like the colours they are portrayed in.

      I guess I like to phrase it as characters dying each other in their own colour, and Towa being the listener, who paints those colours.

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    7. Ya Rei's dad is the worst I hate him... :/ But ya Rei and Taku are literally Towa's parents they dote over and nag at him all the time lol, I find it endearing though. It's nice to see people lookin out for him since he doesn't take care of himself lmao...

      And omg the whole dying other's in their color that's a poetic way to put things, but I feel it! Yeah as an artist it really is Towa taking in everything around him like an empty vessel in order to turn it into his art kinda... Towa is kind of empty in a way so he fills himself with what he gets from others... I really like his character in general, he is so passive but he's very perceptive and a very good listener lol. Depending who's route he goes on he really just lets himself to be influenced by how that guy lives their life.

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    8. lmao ya
      I don't think Towa is the weak type in a fight but he really needs to take care of himself;;;;; 4 days of no food and he can barely walk.

      And speaking of dying in their own colour, I'm playing Madarame's route right now and I really felt that when Towa saw Rei again after being kidnapped, and Rei was yelling to Towa to come back.
      When my online friends and real life friends met each other I had this really weird feeling, like two people from different sides of my life (before/after I moved) that should never have met ended up seeing each other.
      And towa's description of this invisible line between his past and current life really fit that.
      And the way Towa thought that he didn't belong to Rei & Taku's side anymore when Rei yelled at him, really showed how the people and experiences from different routes affect him, and how he himself and his paintings are a reflection of other people's colours that he has been dyed in.
      Man, the way Rei yelled at Towa gave me the feelz...

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    9. Also, I love how you find how more and more about Towa as a character, and about his past as the routes go on.
      And I like how games with NG+ routes (routes that get unlocked by playing other routes) take into account what the readers know and don't know and put dramatical irony here and there, like when Taku is developing drugs without Towa knowing in Madarame's route, but since the player knows we can pick up on the hints here and there from Taku.

      I like to think that, the Towa (shadow) you see in the menu screen, experiences and remembers all the routes in the order you play them, as a way of rediscovering himself through his mental world represented by his studio.

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    10. Yaa I feel the game does the NG+ routes thing really well, each route puts more pieces of the picture together.. tehe. Madarame's route really is quite interesting though and I like how the circumstances really push Towa in ways the other routes don't... it's sad how he feels choosing Madarame means he can't be with Taku or Rei anymore but it says somethin about Towa's view on things I suppose..

      But yeah at the end of it all this whole game really is just like... going through Towa's brain. xD I'd love to write a thesis paper psychoanalyzing Towa sometime... jk. But if someone did I would read it for sure.

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    11. I finally finished the game.
      I wanna lie down on my bed.

      At the end the CGs didn't have as much floating colors and the door to his room in the title page was open, it really shows how Towa was able to clear his mind...

      When Towa inpersonated Maya, and at the same time when you pick POSITIVE and NEGATIVE Towa goes ufufu in his mind as well, I was like OMG wtf is this it's giving me the chills, like mother like son ig.

      I kinda wish Towa was able to see colors, and him being influenced by others' colors was a pretty central part of his character, but at the same time I'm really glad that he was able to clear his mind. I find that with Nitro+Chiral games the MC almost always has some ability or some sort of unusual trait (supernatural or not). A far fetched headcannon makes me wonder if that painting of the hands gave him the ability to see colours....
      The mc of DMMD also lost his feels in his hair, and etc...

      Now I will sit and wait for the next Nitro+chiral game.

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    12. Omgg ya the game really leaves you with so many feelings... Rather than something supernatural personally I like to think of Towa's whole color thing as like somethin more symbolic lol like how he viewed people more as how he'd go manipulating them and just trying to survive and cope in the world to how he's kinda free from all that now and doesn't have to live like that anymore since he comes to terms with his mommy issues... or something. I dunno, but either way it does give a lot to think about. The emotional impact was really good imo!! Regardless of how you interpret it it really hits hard. And yeah even just seeing the new title page I was like... omg my heart.. I am feeling things.

      I want the next n+c game NOW!! T~T Time to wait another 10 years... haha

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  22. I literally made an account just to say that I absolutely fucking love this review and you seem so fun and I wanna be your friend so bad oml, thanks for writing this review istg and all the comments on the pictures where immaculate aswell

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    1. Omg that means a lot to me to hear! Really happy you enjoyed my review so much! :D

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  23. I randomly happened on the manga for SD, realized it was a VN with eng tl coincidentally newly released, then found your review and it literally convinced me to get the game, eternally grateful because it was a fantastic experience! (Despite minor controversy w the translation..) Also, this was an absolutely incredible review lol, hilarious and v useful as an entertaining + comprehensive plot summary (tbh probably one of my fave long-form posts I've read in 2022.. this comment is v belated lol).

    It's a little funny to me how completely meh I was about all the love interests, I really played an entire almost 40 hr VN pretty much solely for Towa (good thing he was the protagonist). Captivating/alluring/bewitching is right... he's such an intriguing character. I really like how it felt that the game overall treats him w a lot of respect (well, I assume, despite the tl) - despite horrifying + massive trauma that profoundly shaped him even though he erased it from his memory entirely, and his objectively abysmal, self-destructive coping mechanisms, he still feels like a complete person w a lot of agency? Which makes it all the more painful when he finds out the truth + loses himself (that was uhh pretty weird tho lol) but also believable how he could find the strength to continue on! I love him so much, I wish he could be coddled and cared for ;-; in a way none of the love interests really do tbh. But it's probably more in character that doesn't happen... Towa would probably reject it anyway...

    The game definitely isn't flawless ofc but I was very impressed w the overall quality, and especially by Fujieda's route. I'm still blown away by Towa's attempted self-immolation surrounded by all the artwork he created + Fujieda's intervention! Also Fujieda himself was such a funny character, based on his first impression I never would've expected him to be like he is. (Sooo happy he gets de-lawyerified!) I liked him a lot but felt he didn't really get a ton of focus, since it's sorta more Towa's route ;-;. Again ty for the review <3

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    1. I'm glad my review convinced you! This defs is such a good VN. I agree with you in that Towa really pushes the story and is the best thing about it... The guys are just there to use as plot devices to let us get to know Towa more!! Haha jk, but seriously he is definitely such an interesting protagonist and it was so fun to get into his head throughout the story. The story rly do cover the darker topics pretty well I think, and I love how it gives so much room to like write character analysis essays about Towa xD He's just so iconic... I'll always love him!

      Fujieda was my favorite for sure though, his silly side really sold me haha though I totally agree his route was more like a Towa route. In the end none of the guys ever really felt like the focus, but that's fine with me since Towa's the best anyways. Anyways, really happy you enjoyed my review! :D

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  24. Bruhh im trying to play this game but im confuse bout madness or euphoria.. did i have to balance it?

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    1. Honestly I don't remember at all, but I think balancing sounds about right. It's been a while since I played so yeah I don't really remember... iirc going hard in either direction gets bad results though I think. Might have to experiment with your options to figure it out.

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  25. I just recently finished Slow Damage in English. Maya's diary is something that struck me to the core. I have been trying to look for a transcript of the original Japanese but could not find one. Would you be so kind as to provide one? My curiosity is killing me! Thank you in advance.

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    1. Hello! Sorry for the late reply! Sadly I don't think I can provide a transcript... I'd have to either record a clip or find a text ripper to do all that and unfortunately I don't really have the time to figure all that out these days. Sorry I can't be of more help!

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  26. I really love your reviews <3 and those comments that you make under pictures, always gets me. This game is one of my favorites and I wish you'd make one for Dramatical Murders (even tho it's kinda old now :(( )

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    1. Thank you! I did play Dramatical Murder but it was way before I started this blog haha. I've been wanting to reread it one of these days though, but no promises. Either way, thanks for reading my blog and commenting :D

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